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2 Bumps

Okay, tell me this: Is it..... adult content

My children - my rules @ my parents

or

Their house - their rules?

My parents apparently feel it is ok to put down my kids, calling them "dumpy" and that they are dressed "sloppy"; putting my 8 yr old in a toddler seat when she doesn't need one (safety concern - since she is TOO BIG FOR IT?!) and telling my kids "I don't care what your mother says - you are with me and her rules don't matter!"

Poll please:

me, my kids, my way of raising them?

or

her, her house/car/etc, her being a b!tch and not caring at all what my kids' feelings are - or mine?

 
Babylove76

Asked by Babylove76 at 3:09 AM on Oct. 4, 2010 in Relationships

Level 21 (10,227 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Your children....YOUR RULES. I understand if you are living with them there are certain aspects you must respect but no one regardless of them being your parents has the right to belittle your children. This is mental abuse and you need to separate them from this form of abuse. It can stay with them for life. You're their mother...Stand up for yours! Good luck and Be blessed
    Cheveyo1

    Answer by Cheveyo1 at 11:36 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I believe regardless of who's house you live in, they are your children so it's your rules that matter.
    Elishas_mommy10

    Answer by Elishas_mommy10 at 3:10 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I think you should have a say so in how your kids are treated.. They are your children. I do not think they should belittle their grandchildren in any way. That is definitely not okay.
    ajc88

    Answer by ajc88 at 4:11 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • There needs to be some mutual respect. She is totally demeaning you and your parenting, which is confusing the kids. What she is doing, by your description, is doing harm to the kids, IMO. They need guidance and discipline. She is confusing them, and that is harming them. They don't know which way to go, who to listen to. They are torn, and are in the middle of something they shouldn't be. I understand your mom having house rules, but she should still follow your rules as well. There needs to be some kind of balance, some common ground.
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 8:12 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • In society there is only 1 legal system. Therefore they need to learn that one set of rules apply everywhere. Your kids - your rules. It will be easier for them to have one set of rules than to remember and apply a different set for every location.
    CassyzMom

    Answer by CassyzMom at 8:36 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • if youre living in her house, you need to respect her wishes and her way of doing things. if you dont like it- leave. i dont agree with the way she treats the kids though. have you tried pulling her aside and talking to her? in the end sometimes you have to swallow your pride, especially when you are living under someone else's roof.. take up for your children though. this is a hard predicament to be in honestly. good luck!

    3xangel

    Answer by 3xangel at 3:29 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I think that rules should be blended. Like your dietary and safety rules should still apply, but since it is their house what/ where the children are allowed to play is up to grandma. You need to talk to them and express your concerns as far as rules and how you expect the kids to be treated. If she can't respect you as an adult you may not want to send the kids over until she can work with you and respect you and your children.
    amandajoy21

    Answer by amandajoy21 at 5:19 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • No matter where you are, your kids your rules. If that person can't respect that, you can stop associating with them. Seriously. If they can't respect your rules or are constantly putting your kids down, I say remove yourself and your kids from that person and the situation. They can see your kids again when they've learned what's appropriate and what's not.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 8:20 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • IMO you should tell her that if she cant respect your children and YOUR rules then she will take the risk of not seeing them until she can learn to. I would not allow her to down talk your children like that and continue to let them go over there. they probably HATE it anyway.
    Ross2010

    Answer by Ross2010 at 10:26 AM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Thank you Elishas_mommy10!! I agree 100%!
    Babylove76

    Comment by Babylove76 (original poster) at 3:19 AM on Oct. 4, 2010