Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Is this wrong of me to ask of my SO?

Recently he and I got into a fight and broke up, well we decided to work things out and get back together. I guess he had been talking to some of his friends that are girls and they are pissed off that this happened and I guess are blaming it all on me. So within the past few days they have been leaving me comments and messages being very rude and saying things that shouldn't be said. They are also leaving comments for him saying things like oh wait til you come home and see what we can do and so on and so forth. So I had said to him that if he plans on things working out that I didn't want him speaking to them anymore because I didn't think it is right for him to be friends with people who will intentionally try to hurt me. Is this wrong of me to ask of him?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:44 PM on Oct. 24, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Nope, not at all. He has a right to have friends, but if those people are intentionally trying to break up a relationship HE is trying to rebuild, he needs to drop them. And if he can't see that, you may need to drop him. Good luck.

    Answer by RenaeMom3277 at 12:46 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • No, it's not wrong of you at all. I would have done the same thing if I were you. If he loves you and truely does want to work things out then he won't speak to them again because of what they are commenting.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:48 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I do not think it is wrong for you to tell him how you feel and he does need to make a decision. If you are telling him that he needs to choose between you and these friends that are rude to you, then you need to be ready for anything.

    He may decide that he would rather be friends with them instead of being in a relationship with you. Just make sure you prepare yourself for that, just in case. I am sorry if that sounds mean it is not my intent.

    I know how hard this is and I think it is very rude of his friends to treat you this way. I also think that it is very unfair that you both have to be put into a situation like this.

    Good Luck

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 12:50 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • No it's not wrong of you at all. If he made the decision that he wanted to try and work it out with you, then he needs to respect that decision. He does need to stop speaking to them, or set boundaries with them. It's not a bad thing to have friends, but when those friends try to interfere with your relatioship then it becomes time to cut them loose.

    Answer by KennsWifey at 1:00 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • No you are not wrong at all. But for one second put yourself in their shoes. While being in an argument with your BF and you spoke to your friends you may have said things to make them really angry at him. It sounds like they are just trying to protect him. Maybe they are going a little overboard but it sounds like something good friends would do. Speak with him regarding his friends behavior. He needs tell them to tone it down and respect his decision to work things out with you. After that if they can't respect his wishes and be kind to you then he needs to make a decision as to whether he wants them as friends or to work things out with you because under the current conditions it's not working either way. Hang in there : )

    Answer by happy2bme7 at 1:57 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • no your not wrong , but he should not have told his friends your personal business....TMO

    Answer by MarksGurl at 2:37 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • no ... nothing at all!! there should be no reason at all why he should still have a friendship with them if they cant support his decisions! if he really cares about you and values your relationship then he's going to have to check his priorities!

    Answer by mommyofTWINS930 at 3:37 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.