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Has your pre-school child ever told you a lie

My 4 year old pre-schooler has said on several occosions that his teacher has hit him in class. He always have evidence to show like bumps on head, bruices on his arm and legs. The first time it happend, it was a pretty big bump which took about 3days to go down. When I asked the teacher, she said she knew nothing of it and that he must have bumped his head while playing. Three more incidence have happend since then. My sister thinks I should take it serious instead of just thinking he hurt himself while playing with other kids. Am I being too naive about this? This is a very well respected private school that he attends and I just think things like this won't happend there.

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Asked by EVE16 at 3:05 PM on Oct. 24, 2008 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (7)
  • Wow that is a tough one because Yes, 4 year olds son loves to try to get away with tiny lies all the time, its like a game to him. Although my son has never lied about someone hurting him. Also- please don't take this wrong but no amount of money you pay for school ensures that the staff will act 100% professionally!!!! I think I would have to take the child seriously on this one. First have a serious one on one with your child- let them know that if they are lieing its best to tell you now because the teacher will get into big trouble if this isn't true.Then I would approach the principal of the school about it & I also would talk to some other mommies in private and see if any other children have similiar complains or have seen anything happen between the teacher and your child. Best of luck honey- I really do hope you child is just lieing! That would be horrible if true.

    Answer by litstargazer at 3:16 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • Yes, my son does make up stories. However I would take this seriously , especially if he only says this about one person...Take notesof "evidence," I know my sons school has to record accidents, especially those which include injury. Try to get him to open up about it, and make sure that he feels comfortable talking to you. Remind him of how much you care for him. Try to get to the bottom of this, because it would be horrible to not address the issue - whether it be him telling made up stories or the teachers abuse. I wish you the best with this difficult issue and hope you find the peace/wisdom to deal with this as gracefully as possible.

    Answer by AndreaM2oo2 at 3:30 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • Kids do lie. Whether he is or not...hard to say, but I'd take him seriously. One thing you can try to attempt to get him to tell the truth IF he is lying, is to explain to him that you are going to go talk to someone who's going to punish the teacher for being so mean to him. Explain that if he's not telling you the truth, this teacher is going to be in big trouble for something she didn't do, like if he were to get in trouble for something his brother/sister/best friend did. Tell him that you won't punish him, but that if he is lying, to please tell you now so someone doesn't get in trouble that shouldn't. I did that when my 4 yr old told me the babysitter wasn't feeding him, and he told the truth, that he just didn't want what she was giving him. Good luck!

    Answer by tropicalmama at 3:46 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • Your obviously a very reasonable person. I would go and talk to the principal. Yes your son could be lying but he could be telling the truth.

    Answer by onethentwins at 5:03 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • Kids like, but like PP said, a good school doesn't mean he's save. My day care is very good. I used to work there and trust most of the people. But one teacher had a bad day and bit one of the kids back! She was fired, but you can't always tell who is going to do what. Just b/c they have educaiton and experience doesn't mean they can't lose their temper from time to time. You just have to hope your school has safeguards in place and responds correctly (if she hadnt' been fired, I wouldn't be using them!)

    One thing to try, is ask him *in front of the teacher* what happened. His story may change. My brother (a little older though) would lie about this teacher so my mom brought them together and he changed his story pretty quick.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:07 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I would definitely take this seriously. Remember! it's always better to be overly concerned and safe then sorry. I'm sure the school is a pretty good school, especially if it's a well respected school like you say, but don't let that fool you. Ok, now the fact that your child has bruises and bumps, should be a huge worry sign. However, teachers should be aware of kids that get hurt or marks from playing and let you know right away when they see any new bruises or bumps on your child. Try and talk w/ your child and ask different questions like why did the teacher do that and how?

    When my daughter was attending preschool, the teachers would check each morning and if she ended up getting hurt, they would let me know. When I would pick her up I would check her again myself, not because I'm overly protective but because things like this can happen.

    Good Luck!!

    Answer by mommysuarez at 6:20 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • I would set my son down & have a serious talk about the fact that you want to be there to protect him but he HAS to tell you the complete truth so you can do something. Tell him that you two are going to go down & set with the teacher to find out what is going on. This way you will find out who is lying by the way the teacher reacts to your questions while speaking to your son. This way it shows that you are trying to find out an answer without accusing anyone.


    Answer by onespecialmom at 11:29 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

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