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What in the hell is wrong with some of these women?!

Why in the hell is it so hard to make mommy friends?! I am so sick of the cliques in my neighborhood! Or the effort I try to put in with other moms and they don't reciprocate? My daughter (16 months) has at least one playdate week with my friend/neighbor down the street. My husband travels every Monday through Thursday nights and is in school for his Master's. We only get him for one uninterrupted day which is on Saturdays! Fridays he works in his office all day! Sunday he works on homework all day! My marriage is suffering abit. I'm lonely all the time! And feeling bitter towards friends who keep making excuses and are too busy! Family lives 2 hours away! All I wanted was to be able to make more friends with the stay at home moms around my area to help fill in the void of loneliness and for my daughter to have more social times with other kids her age!

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MadisonsMom2009

Asked by MadisonsMom2009 at 4:32 PM on Oct. 4, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 2 (6 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • (I know I'm bitter and blue enough to resort to venting on Cafemom when I would normally be EMBARASSED as hell in the first place!!) :( (Please no haters! If you have nothing nice to say-don't say it all at!) Thank you!
    MadisonsMom2009

    Comment by MadisonsMom2009 (original poster) at 4:33 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Maybe they have busy lives of their own? It's HARD to plan play dates when you have a million things going on.
    MommaTurbo

    Answer by MommaTurbo at 4:35 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Try to add some activities to get you out of the neighborhood too. Like the local library's story hour. Also, can you take a few days once in awhile to go visit family? I used to do this before my kids were in school because my husband traveled a lot with his job. It really helped.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 4:36 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • rant on mamma, sometimes you just need to know someone is listening even if it is over the internet. I found moms in my neighborhood using meetups.com. Most of the groups are free to join you just have to read the discription.
    wildwiccan83

    Answer by wildwiccan83 at 4:36 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Check and see if you have a M.O.M.S. Club in your area. I can tell you it saved my sanity when my boys were younger. They are a national organization (Moms Offering Moms Support). They have playgroups based on your children's ages, they have mom's night out, craft night, couple's nights, ours had a bowling league with childcare, all kinds of different activities. I made a lot of friends that way, and I'm still friends with many of them YEARs later!!

    Good Luck!
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 4:37 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I understand. I try to make friends in the neighborhood and all the "parents' in the neighborhood want to be away from their children or in the other neighborhood feel because I work outside the home that I am not a REAL mom because I can't afford to stay home. I can't even be friendly at the park while playing with my son without mom's just completely ignoring me when I say hi - sometimes I wonder why bother, but I know its important for our son to see US have friends too..
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 4:37 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • For some reason, we grown-ups dont make friends as freely as we did as kids. It's sad actually. Since, for whatever reason, the moms in your neighborhood aren't open to a new friend, how about checking your local paper for mom meetings. You could also try joining a church near you & meet lots of wonderful people there. I know it's not the same as face time- but you have friends here at Cafe-mom too :)
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 4:43 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I have the same trouble. I am young & i look even younger. The first few times i picked up DD from school when she was in kindergarten, people were asking me if i was her sister...lol! So, i get a lot of "stares" from parents. I feel like they think bad of me because i am young. Anyhow, her school is filled with ritsey ditsey mommies. I'm probably the poorest parent there...lol. Not many moms are interesting in being my friend either. I made one friend with DD's best friends mother. But, we're not really "friends". She already has lots of friends & is very involved with her social life. We talk after school, thats about it. I just don't have what it takes to ask her if she wants to hang out. I have a feeling that she might not be interested in actually hanging out with me, But whatever. I have different friends that i love anyway...Sorry you are lonely though...
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 4:50 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I hear ya. I am 3 hours away from my family and my husband works 12 hour days. i feel very isolated. I live in a tiny town and don't really have many neighbors around who actually talk to me. I take my son to the park and all the moms there seem way too busy to bother with talking to me. I have yet to meet anyone who wasn't too snotty or just not interested in talking to me at all. I really hate being here with no friends or family. Someday I hope to live closer to my mom. But yes, adults are very bad at making friends and it sucks for people like me who get transplanted and taken away from already existing friends.
    Butterflysky_24

    Answer by Butterflysky_24 at 5:45 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • As for some of you-thank you for listening, support & helpful tips! I really do appreciate it! I am abit embarrassed for my rant on here but it has been boiling underneath the surface for quite sometime now and I guess it was only a matter of time before I exploded. For one month now; I have been dropping my daughter off at our local church Mother's Day Out program (Just like preschool) for a few hours which has been nice to run errands and have some "ME" time. After my post today; made the necessary arrangement for travel next week to see family while hubby is on the road working. It will be nice to spend time with adults and catch up with old friends while I try to figure out how to connect with the other moms here in town. Thanks again Ladies! CafeMom has been a GodSend for advice! :)
    MadisonsMom2009

    Comment by MadisonsMom2009 (original poster) at 8:19 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

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