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my 15 years old son still tries to sleep in our bedroom

not in the bed but on the floor. I've switched his room with one of his siblings, we've changed around his room, we've painted the walls a differednt color, he has a dream catcher we bought him years ago....he's not a mama's boy, never has been. If anything he's a bit of a tuffy, strong, etc. It's such an interruption for us not to mention an invasion of our privacy. None of us get a good night's sleep and when I ask him why he does it he just says he hates his room. Any advise out there??

Answer Question
 
runningoutof...

Asked by runningoutof... at 5:13 PM on Oct. 4, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 3 (20 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • He's 15....you MAKE him sleep in his own room. He is not a 2 year old who is going to whine and cry all night long.

    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 5:14 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I agree with mom2, who is the parent here?
    older

    Answer by older at 5:16 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • i agree with PP , you can get a lock for your bedroom door and lock it in the night time so he can't get in there with you guys
    mommylisar

    Answer by mommylisar at 5:16 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Wow, yeah, I would lock your bedroom door or something. You gotta lay down the line somehow. My MIL was dealing with the same thing, and she just had to say "no more" and make him get back in his room every time he showed up. Good luck...I'd go nuts if a teenager kept trying to sleep in my room. Even my toddlers have been in their own room for a long time - mommy likes her sleep! haha
    aliceryannesmom

    Answer by aliceryannesmom at 5:16 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Ooooo I like the lock idea! LOL!
    mom2twobabes

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 5:17 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • It is a little weird. Is this a recent thing or has he always been like this?
    If its recent, maybe he is being bullyied at school and needs the reassurance.
    Maybe its his bed? Is it uncomfortable?
    I don't really know but keep trying Mamma, something is going on. GL
    FuzNet

    Answer by FuzNet at 5:17 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Have you asked what kind of bedroom he would actually like? Maybe you can help him make baby steps in creating a bedroom that he feels comfy in. But, things like this start from childhood. My ex has a 10 year old son & he always sleeps in his grandmothers room. It;s become a problem in their house. EX does not like it, he wants his son able to sleep on his own. But, grandma "feels sorry" for him if she says no. But, it's becoming a bad habit over there. Did your son sleep in y'alls room for a long time? Because if he is used to it, it's going to be hard to make him want to stop. You need to just say no. Tell him that he is not allowed to sleep in your room anymore. What would he do if you told him that? I
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 5:18 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • WOW! I am sorry that your son & you are going through something like this- i am sure it has to be pretty uncomfortable for both of you-(your husband too!) It sounds like he has some kind of Fear sleeping by himself- Maybe, talking to a counsler would help to find out where this issue is coming from- Wishing you lots of luck!
    daisyb

    Answer by daisyb at 5:27 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • I really appreicate all the replies. I'm sure my inconsistency is part of the problem. I need to get tough and stay tough. we do have a lock on the door just always felt it was cruel to lock out the family but I've got to stop that. The boy needs to grow up and I need to get some sleep. Mind you, he doesn't do this nightly or even weekly but in waves and he started on one of those waves last night. I've never reached out on an internet site b4 and glad I did. Thanks again.
    runningoutof...

    Comment by runningoutof... (original poster) at 6:45 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • It's more cruel to give him this type of control and confusion. He should not usurp the marital bond, and the lovemaking room. Sorry to be so blunt. Could this be an Oedipus Complex thing? You should just give him a basic couple of choices. "Do you want this room or that room. Would you prefer this bedding or that bedding?" and leave those as his only options. No matter his reasons or arguments, tell him "get used to it." In the meantime, and especially if he does not take to this, get professional help. This is not normal and you may have some unhealthy jealousy on your hands.
    fohtrae

    Answer by fohtrae at 9:23 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

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