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Jokes?

I saw another question where someone said can you make me laugh. It's not a question but I wanna hear everyone's jokes.

Here's mine:

A man gives blood to save his girlfriends life. They break up and he says he wants it all back. She hands him a tampon and says, "I'll pay you monthly."

 
Kimmers1116

Asked by Kimmers1116 at 4:30 PM on Oct. 24, 2008 in Just for Fun

Level 3 (14 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • A blonde and a redhead were watching the 6:00 news when a story came up about a man who was threatening to jump off the Brooklyn Bridge. The blonde bet the redhead that the man wouldn't jump off the bridge and the readhead accepted. Well, sure enough, the man jumped and so the blonde gave the redhead the 50 bucks. "I can't take this, you're my best friend." The blonde looked at her, "Just take it." she said. "Well, I saw this on the 5;00 news, so I knew he was gonna jump off." The blonde laughed, "I did too, but I didn't think he'd do it again
    chloe_romano

    Answer by chloe_romano at 6:37 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • did u hear Micheal Jackson just died... the family lawer stated that he ate some 12 yr old nuts!
    navywifemomkoch

    Answer by navywifemomkoch at 4:52 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • how bad is the economy?? .....so bad that wives are having sex with their husbands cause they cant afford batteries!

    how do gay gangsters do a drive-by?
    roll up in a pink ford focus, throw skittles and scream "taste the rainbow bitches!"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:07 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • A blonde was hired at a Tickle me Elmo factory where her job was to give each doll two test tickles. On her first day the assembly line was at a stand still and when her boss went to see why he found her sewing two marble between the legs of an Elmo. "What the hell are you doing?" he asked. "Oh, you said to give each Elmo two testicles!".
    MarlyeGirl

    Answer by MarlyeGirl at 5:42 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • Little Johnny is taking a shower with his mother and says, "Mom, what are those things on your chest!?" Unsure of how to reply, she tells Johnny to ask his dad at breakfast tomorrow, quite certain the matter would be forgotten. Johnny didn't forget. The following morning he asked his father the same question. His father, always quick with the answers, says, "Why Johnny, those are balloons. When your mommy dies, we can blow them up and she'll float to heaven." Johnny thinks that's neat and asks no more questions. A few weeks later, Johnny's' dad comes home from work a few hours early. Johnny runs out of the house crying hysterically, "Daddy! Daddy! Mommy's dying!!" His father says, "Calm down son! Why do you think Mommy's dying?" "Uncle Harry is blowing up Mommy's' balloons and she's screaming "Oh God, I'm coming!"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:30 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • A man and his wife went to bed one night and the man was getting very frisky and asked his wife if she was in the mood. His wife answered, "Not tonight dear I have a headache."

    The man replied, "Is that your final answer"? She said, "Yes."

    ...He said. "Ok, then, I'd like to phone a friend."
    babykins362003

    Answer by babykins362003 at 7:27 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • Why did the Mexican girl get pregnant?

    Because the teacher told her to go do an "essay
    babykins362003

    Answer by babykins362003 at 7:28 PM on Oct. 24, 2008

  • They say there is more life in sperm than there is in blood. So then why doesn't dracula suck dick?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:19 PM on Oct. 24, 2008