Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

I have a seven year old daughter and she doesnt listen to me her dad or her teachers. What can i do?

We have throwed her toys away. Spanked her, put her in the corner with one leg up for hours, We dont buy her anything, we tried talking to her. As a family and indivdually , And we even told her we were taking her to the police? Somebody pls help me befor i go more crazy. And she is not scared of authority.

Answer Question

Asked by MrzWil_1 at 11:38 PM on Oct. 4, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 4 (39 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • This is a very difficult question and there's no one answer. Whatever you try, remember to keep loving her and trying to understand her. My sister in law has a difficult 10 year old who is misbehaving, standing on his desk at school screaming i hate school, etc. and they seem like they've basically stopped loving him. They send him to a different school, don't give him any privileges, and act like they love their other kids more than him. He basically is doing it because he gets no attention from his mom who would rather be at work, and is getting tortured and teased by his older brothers. I hate it. I wish I could adopt him and give him lots of attention and work with him especially hard. Anyways, kids act out for a variety of reasons, and I don't know which one ur daughter is doing it because of, but just tell urself to have infinite love and patience and it will all work out

    Answer by Butterflysky_24 at 11:41 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Wow, that's tough. I agree w/ Butterfly, keep assuring her of your love for her. She needs to understand that there are boundaries that she can not cross nder any circumstances. There might be some underlying issue that she can't express that is causing her to act out. There is no harm in having her see a professional. I would caution you not to tell her that you're taking her to the police. That may open a whole other can of worms. I do hope you find a solution soon.

    Answer by 69humblepie at 11:53 PM on Oct. 4, 2010

  • Well having 3 girls and a stepdaughter and all my friends had nothing but girls I can tell you this......

    7 yr old girls are nightmares to deal with, I could have easily walked away from any of my daughters at that age...good news is when they turn 8 yrs old it gets better...something about 7 turns every little girl into a nightmare...or training for when they turn 14

    Answer by togo90210 at 12:07 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Consistency in one punishment is going to be your best friend. Do not jump from one thing to another. At seven you could still do time outs but taking away privileges start to be more effective the older they get. Make sure tha tyou follow through.

    Answer by Melbornj at 1:24 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Why not try rewarding her when she is good and telling her that you love her, and stop telling her she's a bad kid and will go to the police!!

    Answer by WomanWitty at 7:56 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • at 7 she could be having hormone problems. My niece was a nut case once a month she would bawl her eyes out over the slighest thing. My sister works with OBGYN's and kind of jokingly said something one day and the Doc said that yes girls as young as 5 can start doing the whole hormone thing even though they are years away from having their period (glad I had boys) You might want to look into that. She needs to have consistency and you need to let her know you love her not her behavior. I personally would go with 1-2-3 magic look it up online and try it. It works wonderful. If all else fails bring her to a therapist G/L


    Answer by justgrape723 at 9:27 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • oh and don't say that you are going to take her to the police (#1 for what?? and #2 it isn't realistic and she knows that) it is an empty threat and kids figure that stuff out very fast.
    If you are going to make a threat about a punishment keep it real and one that you can and will follow thru on

    Answer by justgrape723 at 9:29 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • First of all, it is inappropriate of YOU to put her in the corner for hours with one leg up. That could be considered abusive on your part. Second of all, try a positive approach. Negative is obviously not working for you. You could find something she likes and when friday comes, you can let her have a treat. If she isn't good she just won't get a treat.
    Be careful.

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 10:01 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Read Parenting with Love and Logic. It will help you get some perspective and teach you some tools for helping her (and you) make better choices.

    Answer by mellonhead at 11:03 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • When you say you have tried everything it makes me wonder if you have tried just being consistent with boundaries and discipline in a more simple way. Letting your child know what is expected and exactly what the consequences are if she doesn't do what is expected, but also offering rewards for good behavior. I also agree on reading Love and Logic.

    Answer by KTMOM at 10:42 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.