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8 Bumps

If you have someone staying with you, do you expect them to follow house rules,or allow their children and themselves do as they want and disrupt your household?

I am a disabled woman who has two adult kids who are disabled. One is autistic the other terminally ill. I allowed a friend and her family(husband and two sons ages 2 and 4) to stay with me when they were without a place to stay.They stayed here for approx 2 and a half months. I live in a two bedroom apartment. My daughter and I were doing the majority of work.This friend was on the computer from 8 in the morning till 1 or 2 am, claiming to be WORKING. We dealt with the kids baths,feeding them,dressing them, cleaning up their messes. Yet the mother didn't want us to discipline them at all. The 4 yr old had smeared poop on my shower curtain, both children would pee all over my bathroom floor and the mom never cleaned it up or said anything to them about it. When I put my foot down and said if your in my house its my rules whether you like it or not, she claimed I didn't know MY BOUNDARIES of how she was raising her kids.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:58 AM on Oct. 5, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (20)
  • Kick there ass out NOW. If you haven't already for real that is disrespectful and the ones besides you and your children suffering is them darn children. I believe children want to be disciplined.

    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 2:03 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Please, pull the welcome mat out from under them. They know better.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 2:08 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Thank you , for your answer. This mom, doesn't want them to learn boundaries or restriction.She claims to want to home school cause she doesn't want her kids to conform to authority. She wants them to be leaders not followers. Her 2 yr old taught himself to be potty trained and when I requested over and over that an adult go in the bathroom with them she refused, claiming they needed their privacy. I'd like to know when did a 4 and 2 yr old NEED privacy? It wouldn't have been a major issue but i have a bad back and knee and would go into the bathroom and slip on their urine. The 4 yr old would watch True Blood which bothered me tremendously. I feel there are age appropriate programs for kids and she felt I was wrong. We would fight over what I felt they should be watching in my house. She even informed me that she didn't want to hear me use the words age appropriate anymore, cause that didn't exist .
    Fantasydreamer

    Answer by Fantasydreamer at 2:17 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • It is your house, so they should abide by your rules. If they dont like it show them the door
    lchristianson5

    Answer by lchristianson5 at 2:25 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Your house, your rules!
    Mme.Langley

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 2:34 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Forget that mess!! I say you're house you're rules. If she doesn't like it she can feel free to find somewhere else to live. You have enough to deal with in your own life you don't need to put up with her and her children's issues as well.
    Skipo510

    Answer by Skipo510 at 3:02 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • That would bug me to no end. First, that is a lot to handle when you already have your hands full so -- they should be extremely grateful that you were offering to help them when they obviously could not make it on their own. The two children need to have discipline in their life. She should have to get off her lazy butt and take care of her children. It isn't right for her to use people in that way. Also, those kids do not need to be going to the bathroom alone.. they make messes and get into everything! And True Blood is not appropriate for a four or two year old to watch. It is on HBO... which isn't exactly kid friendly. I think that they have issues that need to be handle in their own environment which would be far away from your residents.

    I hope things get better for you.
    ajc88

    Answer by ajc88 at 3:32 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Kick them out and call CPS. Clearly this person has no idea how to raise children and as a home schooling mom, I am disgusted by her beliefs that her children should not conform to authority. It is people like her that give home schoolers a bad name! It is obvious that she neglects her children's basic needs and that is abuse. Call CPS right now! These children need someone to protect them and clearly the so called mother isn't doing it!
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 7:31 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • That is disrespectful and horrible that they did that to you. Most certainly let the door hit them on the way out! I do expect people to follow my house rules without a doubt. They are simple, remove your shoes at the door, and no drinks and food allowed outside the kitchen.
    blogginmomma

    Answer by blogginmomma at 7:50 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • I also had another family living with me. Good friends. Known the kids all my life. My house, my rules. Their kids did chores too. The youngest asked why she had to do chores, my oldest looked at her and said, "You're living here ain't ya? It's called contributing."
    motherofhope98

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 8:05 AM on Oct. 5, 2010

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