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2 Bumps

CPS was called on me, but I knew it was coming....now what?

My son has had many problems with biting and beating on other children and some adults. I still think he is too young to be consider ADHD. But during the summer, my boyfriend and I caught my 5 year old son biting his 3 year old sister. Time outs and take aways were not working. My boyfriend asked if he could spank him and I said yes. My daughter had huge round purple marks on her back, the staff of her daycare would later question me on the marks. My boyfriend attempted to spank my son once with his belt, my son kicked and moved and the belt came down the side of his stomach. It left an ugly gash, nothing deep but took the top layer off. My boyfriend felt horrible and never spanked him again, my son continued to pick at the scab. Now, the school saw it and he explained what happened, I didn't want him to lie. But will they take him away. I have schedule a meeting with the woman who saw him for this incident.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:45 PM on Oct. 5, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (16)
  • They are going to monitor your family for a while. I would get your son checked out hun. If your son is 5 years old, he is not too young to be diagnosed with something. Bring him to a doctor asap.
    xxlilmomma09

    Answer by xxlilmomma09 at 1:50 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Spanking is your own decision. Spanking with a belt is abuse. If your daughter has big welts from being hit...that is abuse as well.

    Mr. boyfriend needs to be removed from your home...
    Acid

    Answer by Acid at 1:52 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • I dont think thats too early to diaganos him take him to a Dr. as for them taking him away well its possible so be prepared.
    L0vingMy3Girls

    Answer by L0vingMy3Girls at 1:55 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Be honest with them and tell them exactly what happened.

    They don't want to take your children away...they want to make sure they are safe and healthy.

    UpSheRises

    Answer by UpSheRises at 1:57 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Yeah, hitting with a belt is a big no-no. If it comes down to keeping your kids or your bf, I hope you pick your kids. They're probably going to make your son go to therapy.
    Shanna84

    Answer by Shanna84 at 1:57 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Is your boyfriend the father of the children? If not, and this is only my opinion, he should not be allowed to use physical punishment with your children. That is a decision that only the biological parents should make. If your kids were with their father, would you be ok with his girlfriend spanking them, especially with a belt?

    Nobody can say for sure if they're going to take him away. First they're probably going to suggest that you're the only discipliner in the home and they might remove your boyfriend for a while if they find him abusive. Parenting classes and other classes will probably be mandatory for both of you. I realize that CPS can make mountains out of mole hills but they take every little scrape and bruise seriously.

    At 5 he could be checked out for a behavioral disorder. I'd have him checked if I were in your shoes. good luck
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 1:58 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • I ead what you said, the welt on your daugter were from your son! They wil monitor you, and I must say, I spank, but me and DH wold never use a weapon ( belt, spoon, paddle) I do feel that it is abuse! And relaxon your BF< he made a mistake, and as long as he leared from it, that is what is important!
    JoLee12345

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 1:59 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • I would never allow a "boyfriend"(or anyone whos not the father) to spank my child! I am not against spanking but, damn girl thats just wrong! First of all, if your five year old is still bitting and attaking people then he needs professional help (that you havent gotten him)! I hope CPS gets the whole story, because then they will decide what is best for your son and daughter because obiously havent been making the right choices for them!
    mistie3480

    Answer by mistie3480 at 2:00 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Ok Acid did you read the Mom's comments at all? The little girl had marks on her back due to her brother biting her. I do think the boy needs help.
    dlshaner

    Answer by dlshaner at 2:02 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

  • Im not against spanking but if you hit hard enough to leave a gash then there is a problem. CPS is stressful good luck.
    SarahNKnapp

    Answer by SarahNKnapp at 2:02 PM on Oct. 5, 2010

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