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2 Bumps

How do I handle this situation? Nicely...

I had just gotten our DS to sleep the other day, and my g/f had forgotten something at the house, so she came home, picked him up, started kissing him, and he woke up, then she said "okay well i love you guys i have to get back to work now" and left me with a baby that was crying and fussy, and did not want to go back to sleep, or even let me lay him down at all. This is a reoccurring thing. The other day when she was at home and I was at work, i called, and when we were getting off the phone, i told her to give him kisses for me. Her reply was "I'm not doing that right now, he's sleeping, i don't want to wake him up" It so frustrating, because its like she doesn't see what she is doing. Is there a NICE way that I can handle this? Blah, help please?

 
awasmer828

Asked by awasmer828 at 1:55 AM on Oct. 6, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 13 (1,107 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • When you have a moment together. Sit down with her and just talk to her about it. Tell her that the other day, you noticed that when she was leaving, she gave him kisses, which woke him up. You could say that you know she's just being affectionate, which you like, but that it makes it hard for you when she leaves, because he doesn't go back down. Maybe she doesn't realize he won't go back to sleep when she leaves. Approach it as "I just want to point something out that I've noticed" and "I would appreciate it if you didn't wake him". Rather than "you keep doing this" "you're driving me nuts". You really don't even have to mention the fact that she won't wake him when she's the one watching him (because that may make her defensive), unless it continues even after your conversation.
    AJ072506

    Answer by AJ072506 at 2:05 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • idk what to really tell you "nicely" because I am waaaaaaaaaay to much of a bitch! lol I would be all over her like flies on poo! i bumped ya tho!
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 1:59 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • i guess it is time to sit and have along talk with her ,hay i don't mind you coming over but when the baby is a sleep please do not go in to the bed room and kiss him if you blow one that would be great because where having hard time but him back to sleep at night thanks
    dutchcanadain

    Answer by dutchcanadain at 2:09 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • Tell her FFS. She likely doesn't realize what she is doing. Point it out and say "Now if YOU were the one staying here with him would YOU want him woken up again so you had to get him back to sleep AGAIN?"

    She'll figure it out. If not she's going to need a "not so nice" notification.
    Allergic2Stupid

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 2:10 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • all you can do it talk to her calmly and say I'd appreciate it if you wouldnt wake the baby up if hes sleeping because I have to deal with the fussing and crying when you leave, its inconsiderate and if she can't respect it then she wouldnt be allowed at the house at a certain time of night
    toybar02

    Answer by toybar02 at 3:55 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • ha thanks babylove. I'm trying to be nice, he's only 6 weeks old, and we're both new to the whole mommy thing. i just get so frustrated!!
    awasmer828

    Comment by awasmer828 (original poster) at 2:01 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • You just have to tell her when it is not in the moment. Just say that when you wake him up I can't get him back to sleep. She should understand that.

    Then when she goes to do it next time... SAY SOMETHING. "no, don't wake him up.. please." to remind her.
    Niki_sd

    Answer by Niki_sd at 2:16 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • Thank you guys so much!
    awasmer828

    Comment by awasmer828 (original poster) at 2:21 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • well we're a couple, so i couldn't technically kick her out of our house, that wouldn't be very nice lol. but i will definitely talk to her about it :)
    awasmer828

    Comment by awasmer828 (original poster) at 3:57 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • We use to tell my BIL, you wake him up, you deal with him!
    tracy0812

    Answer by tracy0812 at 6:57 AM on Oct. 6, 2010