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My bf thinks I'm too nice to my ex while I'm dealing with the kids.??

When I talk to my ex about the kids I'm nice. Granted he did me dirty but I forgave him & trying to keep things decent bc it's easier on everyone. I have let what my ex say get to me a few times, so my current bf thinks i'm still emotionally attached to my ex. Keep in mind when ppl I know say something negative to me it affects me it's just the type of person I am ya know. I told him why I'm nice, and that me & my ex both agree we do NOT want to be w/ each other & that we are only civil for the kids sake. My ex will ask if I'm okay and I'll just say I'm straight, bc how I'm feeling isn't his business, but IDK...is my current bf just being jealous or what. My current bf doesn't have kids if that factors a part in anyway. Advice?

 
LasciviousVamp

Asked by LasciviousVamp at 11:37 AM on Oct. 6, 2010 in Relationships

Level 8 (225 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • your bf is going to have to learn that your ex will always be in your life because you have children together. There will always be an emotional bond between you and him because of that. He obviously knew you had children that werent his and entered into the relationship anyway. Tell him that he is going to have to trust you and get over it or else it will eat away at your relationship until you are both bitter. He shold be supportive and understanding that you want to have a good relationship with the father of your children.
    foxracing43701

    Answer by foxracing43701 at 11:53 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • its your bf's insecurity and the fact he feels threatened by the ex that factors into his behavior/attitude. he may not feel threatened physically, but emotionally. and that's all on him..because you do have an emotional bond with your ex, you have kids together!
    your bf will either have to get over it, or get out, or you're gonna have this kinda crap to deal with continually.
    my sis's dh is the same way towards her daughter's dad. so much that my sis has instructed my niece to 'not mention' her daddy or their various outings, like my sis is trying to keep it secret. wth?? that's just too much drama for my time. i wouldn't put up with such an insecure, little 'boy'. (and, yes, my BIL does have kids from his first marriage, too!)
    grown-ups should know how to play nicely..especially when there are kids involved.
    dullscissors

    Answer by dullscissors at 11:42 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • I would remind so that you and ex are over and done with on a personal level and you both have moved on and the only 'common link' you and ex share are the children-- who come first in your life. Which means that ex will be in your life for a good long while and the 2 of you (you/ex) need to communicate with each other to give the children a stable and secure life. I would re I would tell so that he has nothing to feel jealous or threatened about -- as you are with HIM now.... not ex. If he can't seem to deal with it or get over his insecurity/jealousy then maybe he should attend counseling, or maybe he should end the relationship.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 11:56 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • i been wit a guy 3 years we recently broke up and trust we get along way better as long as it only involves the kids it cool but she should be glad ya bf wants to know how u feeling just explain that yall relation is just about the kids nothing mure or less besides wen yall get along things r way less stressful
    kai302

    Answer by kai302 at 11:45 AM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • My bf and I are working on our relationship because he does have trust issues from previous relationships and he thinks I'm going to go back to my ex. It just gets so frustrating because I don't know if it's me not explaining how I feel good enough to where he can understand or if he's just really that jealous that he believes I'm going to go back...so idk
    LasciviousVamp

    Comment by LasciviousVamp (original poster) at 11:50 AM on Oct. 6, 2010