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How to deal with your child when he's being acused of bullying?

My son has been friends with another boy since Pre-K, they are in 6th grade. The other boy has anger management issues, and is very much codled by his mother (basically this boy never does anything wrong and everything is always someone else's fault). Regardless of this, my son is being accused of bullying her child since they were in 4th grade she told me tonight. I know my son has issues with this boy, but I have never seen him bully him, I have seen him defend himself when this boy attacked him hitting kicking and biting, I have heard him tell this boy when they are arguing to shut up and stop arguing, and I have seen heard my son tell him to stop cheating and I have seen my son defend other children when this boy harrasses them. My son is no saint, however my son is not a bad child, I have never seen him make fun of this other boy, call him names or hit him (he has held him down until he calms down) cont...

 
blessedwboysx3

Asked by blessedwboysx3 at 9:41 PM on Oct. 6, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 21 (10,897 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/behavior/no_bullying.html

    http://www.empoweringparents.com/Why-Do-Kids-Children-Teens-Bully-and-How-to-Stop-Bullies.php
    iNk-FrEaK

    Answer by iNk-FrEaK at 9:43 PM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • cont...I believe I handled things well, making no excuse for my son and the behavior her son is perceiving as bullying. She told me tonight her son asked to be homeschooled band that he should just kill himself. I feel for her, and I want my son to be aware of some of the things that he is doing are affecting this boy and he needs to be more aware of the things he says and what he does. I also believe that my son maybe doing somethings when he is with another friend you know group mentality. I plan to talk to my son no question about that. The problem I'm having is that I don't know how to express her that my son isn't the total problem. I know that her son has instigated much of the problems, he cheats, lies, tattles, , bites, yells, hits...I know the rest of the boys are tired of it, it doesn't excuse their behavior, she needs to recognize his behavior as well for things to get better, how would you express this?
    blessedwboysx3

    Comment by blessedwboysx3 (original poster) at 9:50 PM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • Thank you for the website that is going to be helpful tonight in my discussion with my son. I don't want any one to think that I am condoning my son's behavior at all. I just know this family and this child and all the things people have said and seen. We live in a very small community and we all know each other and spend a lot of time together, and not once has any one perceived my son as being a bully, in fact is the opposite everyone see's her child as the bully. However even with that being said if my son's action are hurting another person I will address it and work to make it stop.
    blessedwboysx3

    Comment by blessedwboysx3 (original poster) at 9:55 PM on Oct. 6, 2010

  • well i think its great that you are doing something about it some parent become so defensive and hurt the child more by not getting the help they need...GOOD MOMMY YOU ROCK
    iNk-FrEaK

    Answer by iNk-FrEaK at 10:28 PM on Oct. 6, 2010

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