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i cant do this anymore- feeling very overwhelmed and about to loose it

im a sahm that works at home doing daycare. i have 5month old and 8yr old. during the week i take care of a 9month old and some 3yr olds. i keep my house clean and try to have dinner done by the time my husband comes home. my problem is its getting to be too much. when hes home i still have to clean, take care of the baby and my son.when the baby goes to bed and wakes up he will sit at the comp or couch and just say things like "momies coming" or she prefers you.if i want to go somewhere he says i need to take her. dont get me wrong hes a good husband but i need help. today hes going hunting and of course im stuck at home all day with no money.i really dont have any friends cause i can never get out of the house by myself, CONT

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:48 PM on Oct. 25, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • Stop being a doormat for him. Dump a wet diapered screaming baby in his lap and GO OUT for a couple of hours. He'll have a new respect for you after that!
    companygoddess

    Answer by companygoddess at 3:26 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • when i explain to him this he just basically shrugs it off and says it s my job. we go out maybe 2 times a month when I plan it.im tired of taking care of kids all day and then when he comes home i still have to clean and take care of the kids cause hes to busy playing on the comp or just doesn't want to deal with it. im at the end of my rope. i need free time and i dont get it. i cant just leave him with the baby and take off cause he'll stop me and say "we can go out together" even thou it doesn't happen. i dont mind doing daycare i just want equal partnership when he comes home. he says he works all day, like i dont, and always has plans to do things but i cant. im about to say FU** it all and just leave. Any advice on how to handle this, yes i have talked and it doesn't seem to help. he just thinks im putting him down.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:53 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • also not cleaning is not an option, i run a daycare so my house has to be clean!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:58 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • SOMETHING has to go. I'd make it HIS laundry. It's his job now.

    Or give up the daycare. The loss of income should register on his radar.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:17 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • iagree with pp. stop the daycare and see what he does. no man tells a woman its her jobdo take care of the kids etc. im sorry that is just my belief. That is disrespectful. If my dh told me that he would be single. men need to respect their wives just like we are supposed to respect them. I would go on a week vacation by myself and let him see just what you do while he is at work.
    bubblebean

    Answer by bubblebean at 3:24 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • My hubby didn't get it either till he got a birds eye view of parenting 101. I'm not sure how to tell you to go about it really. I finally just told my hubby that I've been with these kids 24/7 for x amount of time and I think he should be able to watch them while I run to the store.... that I'd prolly just be happy getting to go pee without a couple of extra people in there with me. I would walk outside for a few minutes to just get a moment of peace, or volunteer to do yardwork if he'd sit and watch tv with the kids to get some me time. At one point I'd told my hubby that me getting frustrated and yelling at our kids for stupid things was the point he needed to volunteer to watch them and give me a few minute break and he does now. Not as often as I'd like but I'll take what I can get.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 4:51 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • Don't give him a choice, after your daycare kids go home dump the kids in his lap and run out the door and don't come back for a couple of hours.
    sammiesmom2000

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 5:09 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • Tell him to shut up and take the baby then leave the house. Dot' give him a choice in the matter, OR you can make him start paying you for doing his half of the work! You change 4 diapers a day make him pay you $10.00 for the other two, you wash his clothes? another $20.00. he says it's your job? make him pay you for it!
    chyna_doll

    Answer by chyna_doll at 5:23 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • thats a funny one chyna doll, i may just consider it next time he says that!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:55 PM on Oct. 25, 2008

  • HONEY IF I WAS YOU I WOULD JUST GET UP ONE DAY WHEN HE DOESN'T HAVE TO WORK AND SNEAK OUT BEFORE HE GETS UP AND LEAVE HIM WITH THE CHILDREN AND HE WILL SEE HOW HARD IT IS ON YOU TO DO EVERYTHING BY YOURSELF
    sniyah

    Answer by sniyah at 7:44 PM on Oct. 25, 2008