Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Husbands and female friends

Do you trust your SO to have female friends? Every one thinks I'm crazy because my SO bf is a female. He spends lots of time fishing and hanging out but I trust he is just friends with her.

Answer Question
 
preciouschild

Asked by preciouschild at 1:23 AM on Oct. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,304 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Your husband might see her as a friend. But how does that friend feel about him. When my husband and I first met, he had a handfull of female friends. I thought it was odd that he did not fall for any of them especially since they were all gorgeous and come to find out, his best friend (female) was secretly inlove with him. Why are you not joining them? once a man decides to be in a relationship, its a package deal and you should accompany them too. Trust only goes so far.
    alejandra559

    Answer by alejandra559 at 1:28 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • My husband has female friends at work and is friends with our couple friends. I have no problem with it I know he loves me. One of these female acquaintances wanted to go to lunch with him so he was like, okay I'll bring my wife and son along where'd you wanna go.? She told him never mind she just wanted to go with him...he stopped talking to her. another one of his friends is spreading rumors around that I am pregnant...GIRLS!!!!!=0)
    OBImomma

    Answer by OBImomma at 1:33 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • I would trust my DF's judgment. He does not have any female friends but I would not be opposed to him having some. He is grown, he knows what we have together, he knows what would be at stake & above all he respects me & our relationship. I know that I could trust him to remain friends with a woman & that he would sever ties with a woman if it ever crossed the line
    stressedmomma13

    Answer by stressedmomma13 at 1:38 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • my husband has female friends that he has actually slept with and i still trust him. although i don't think it's proper for a married man or women to be seen with the opposite sex out in public along together. if my husband sees his girl friends i'm always there or their husbands are there. although we are kinda what you would say is prude as we follow old traditional beliefs and standards. him having to have me be there has nothing to do with mistrust it's more of why wouldn't i be there or the other way around of why their bf or husbands aren't there when he is.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 1:42 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • From the other angle my bestfriend is a guy. We have been friends since we were 4 years old and I could NEVER think of him in a romantic way. When he first met his wife she was kind of fearful of me, but came to realize I was no threat to her. Now DH and BF are friends while his wife and I are friends and our kids all play together. So, there are times when a guy and a girl can be just friends.
    dmbutler

    Answer by dmbutler at 1:47 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • Crap!!! Call me insecure if you want to but sooner or later something ends up happening. Sure, husband can have friends but to have a friend female to go out fishing and hanging out, come on, why not do those things with the wife or with the friend's (female) spouse. Of course this is just my opinion and I might be out of wack but I wonder why we have soooo many divorces.
    momplus01

    Answer by momplus01 at 2:25 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • Its hard to say... Bc almost all of my really good friends are guys. And it would never go beyond just friends, some of them are like brothers to me. But my boyfriend isn't comfortable with me hanging out with any of them. Yes, I get upset bc I feel he doesn't trust me. But when its the other way around I trust him but not her and feel a little jelouse per say... That she's getting some of my boyfriends time...
    lilma0608

    Answer by lilma0608 at 2:29 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • We only are really friends with other couples.. He has his guy friends that are single tho and I have my girls that are single.. It just works better this way. I guess it is just different depending on how the two people in the relationship feel about it...
    ajc88

    Answer by ajc88 at 3:48 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • Personally, things like that are "one thing led to another". Many times when a male and female are alone together, you never know if something can trigger a deeper feeling. It is ok to have friends, but YOU should be the top female in his life. I have many couple friends. I get along with men very well, but I would never disrespect another woman by being alone with her man. Because of this, they in turn realize they can trust me. If their husband makes a hit on me (and believe me, they have), I tell him off and tell him to show more respect for his wife. Usually they will say "Oh, she won't know" I then tell them, well, I do and you do and that is a line that will not be crossed. So, for a man to be alone with another woman for any extended amount of time, nope, not in my book.
    MaryWolfe

    Answer by MaryWolfe at 7:26 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • I don't care. They're adults and they know their boundaries. They know the consequences of any actions related to infidelity.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 10:19 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.