Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

am i wrong? adult content

ok i have been with my man for 6 yrs we have two kids and have been living together for almost 4 yrs i think. we live with my parents which is ok i mean it causes some fights but its not too serious. but anyway im so ready to get married like im on the verge of tears rite now thinking about it. But i dont think that my bf is ready. there has been 2 times where he said we will get married and hasnt went through with it. and seriouslly it has hurt me so bad. but i love him and he is good to me and the babies. but he says yes to things just to get me to be quiet sometimes and that pisses me off as well. so am i wrong for wanting this or should i just be happy with what i got?

Answer Question

Asked by Tiffany_Rivera_ at 1:24 AM on Oct. 8, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (879 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I don't think you're wrong for wanting this, but I do think you should wait until he is ready. it's never good to push someone to get married. maybe he's just not ready, or scared, or wants to be more financially set, or maybe marriage just isn't a big deal to him... just try to be patient. I know I was with my DH for 8 years and had two kids before we got married too :)

    Answer by young-not-dumb at 1:28 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • I think it all depends on just how important this is to you. It sounds like it's important, but is it important enough to give him an ultimatum about? You can't force someone to do something they don't want to. Have you tried to find out WHY he hasn't married you? Does he just not want to be married? Does he not want a wedding? Is he afraid things between you two will change? I think you should try to find out why he doesn't want to get married as well as letting him know the reasons why you DO want to get married and go from there.

    Answer by sandrizzle at 1:32 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • i don't think anyones feelings are ever wrong. if this is something that you have always wanted & is important to you i don't see why you shouldn't expect it. i think everybody wants to get married & that most men know it's expected that a women would want him to marry her @ 1 point. although since you have been living with him for so many yrs i would assume that he feels there's no need to marry. why?we are together we have children & we're basiclly already married. right? well kinda the thing is if he felt he already was then why not marry you? right? of course i feel he should marry you if not cause he loves you & he cares about your feelings & knows this what you desire but for his children. i think that he needs to show you his real true level of commitment & give you that ring you so deserve otherwise what are you going to do for the rest of your life just play house? there r added bonuses 2 being legally married.

    Answer by melody77 at 1:34 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • I know this is hard for you & I hate to say it, but if after 2 kids & 6 years, he still isn't ready, he probably never will be.

    Answer by stressedmomma13 at 1:35 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • My dh's ex gave him the ultimatum. I never did. Only time will tell but I like to think it already has.

    Answer by BluDog at 2:41 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • No your not rong for wanting more but at the same time like my mom says a marriage is just a ring piece of paper and a name change not to mention a lot of money if you truely love each other then you should be gr8ful you have someone to love and who loves you back and youve already stated hes good to the babies so why as k for more it kinda sounds like you have the world now and who knows one day he may surprise you so stop asking and let him come around to it in his own time you dnt wana push him into it and fear the chance of him regreting his descision later
    Talisa G.

    Answer by Talisa G. at 4:17 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • You aren't wrong for wanting to be married to the one you love. Ask him what his true thoughts are and not to sugar-coat anything or tell you what he thinks you want to hear.

    Answer by _Tam_ at 10:18 AM on Oct. 8, 2010

  • Be happy with wat u got

    Answer by Brandensmomm423 at 10:39 PM on Aug. 12, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.