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How long does it take for ur children to adjust to being separated and eventually divorced?

My two kids seem to b terribley upset about their momma & daddy not being together anymore. They act out and my kids r not perfect, but they usually don't act like this. I understand they r hurting & have let it out somehow. I just want to help them as much as i can. Their daddy isn't here enough and don't talk to them or feels guilty and wants to ignore it. Any help would b appreciated.

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Asked by Trina272008 at 1:30 AM on Jul. 3, 2008 in General Parenting

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Answers (5)
  • I'm sorry to say but there is really no set time frame here. Keeping open communication with them will help a lot. You could also try to get a non-biased person to talk with them, a friend, neighbor. Be honest with them. You don't have to go into details but it may help. Making sure that they know it is not their fault and they are loved as much as ever is the most important thing.

    Answer by Mrs.Chase at 1:43 AM on Jul. 3, 2008

  • my parents separated when my sister and i was around 6 and 7 years of age it affected me for life until i was 18 1/2 im 19 now. i hurts because i love both of them and dont want to see neither hurt their my heart.

    Answer by t_cutie_07 at 2:28 AM on Jul. 3, 2008

  • my parents got divorced when i was 5 years old.. (my sister was 6 and my brother was 3) it took so long for me to adjust to it..i'm now 20 years old. i guess i adjusted to it when i was 15 years old..when my mom met her current boyfriend..(but both my parents got re-married my dad's marriage lasted 1 year..i still talk to my stepmom..and my mom's marriage only lasted 8 months)

    Answer by usmcwife2007145 at 8:56 AM on Jul. 3, 2008

  • I'm not sure they ever "adjust" A lot depends what went on to cause the divorce. How abusive the other parent was,etc, Some may be relieved, but, some hold on to it regardless of the cause

    Answer by zbee at 10:21 AM on Jul. 3, 2008

  • My Stepkids just started adjusting to their new situation. They understand their parents are seperated and seem alright because my hubby and his x and I are able to communicate with no hostility anymore. They see that balance and have seemed to calm. The only thing is the three year old cried for her mother when she's with us but then cried because she has to leave our home when she goes back to her mom. She just over that and now is testing the boundries of my authority. (Like looking dead at me and doing something I just asked her not to do) There is no set limit for when children adjust. You just have to show them you love them and take it a day at a time.

    Answer by LilHellion at 11:01 AM on Jul. 3, 2008

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