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Being Bullied in catholic school? PIOG

I am so sad. We moved and I thought I had found an excellent school for my 3rd grade son. But he hasn't made friends. He says the boy who sits next to him is mean to him, Pushes him, calls him names. I emailed the teacher, she said she would talk to the boy and "We don't toloerat that here." My son says the boy still bothers him. My son really wanted to be in Cub scouts. Today I get this email saying Cub scouts will be delayed because of a sport that every boy in the pack but my son is playing. Really, it said, "Every boy except S..." My son started to cry. First he said " I wish I was in, I wish I didn't go to that school" What can I do?? I had hoped joining Scouts would help him to meet other kids, instead he is already feeling left out. Any thoughts?? It is an excellent school academically. I don't want to teach him to give up by just driving him back to his old school...

Answer Question

Asked by chicanueva at 9:39 PM on Oct. 10, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 4 (50 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Bullying doesn' t discriminate by religion. I was bullied more by church kids in private school than anywhere else.

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 9:43 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • You cannot remove him because of one boy. And just because he didn't play that one sport is no reason to fall apart either. Stuff like that happens when you first move.

    Go to the school and get the bully taken care of.

    Either sign him up for the sport they all play or kindly wait until Cub Scouts start and start then.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 9:45 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • Unfortunately there is bullying everywhere. In public schools, private schools, religious schools (you should hear some of the crap at my kids' school) and in the workplace. I would work with the school, and raise h*ll if you must, to make sure it is dealt with properly.

    I am sure that your son misses his old school and his friends there. I can only imagine what he is feeling and then he doesn't get along with the kid next to him and cub scouts is postponed. It is a lot to deal with. Keep an eye on him, and encourage him in that it will get easier and eventually better.

    Answer by balagan_imma at 10:58 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • My oldest daughter was bullied terribly in 8th grade at Catholic school. Since the school didn't want to do anything about it, I took matters into my own hands. It had gone on since 5th grade when we moved here, but 8th grade was really bad.

    See if the school will take care of it, go to the principal, threaten to take care of it yourself if they don't want to do anything about it. Teach him to fight back, not physically, but just by staying and facing it head on. I hope things get better for him, I know how awful it is to be a parent and watch it happen.

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 10:59 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • Honestly, that Cub scout leader would be having this momma bear beating down his door. There was no reason for him (or her) to put in the notice that your son is the only one not playing. They could have simply said "we have several boys enrolled in x sport, so we are going to hold off on starting this year, until x sports season is over." Are you sure it's not the bullies father running the group?
    As far as the bully, if the teacher has talked to him, and he is still bullying your son, I would go into the school. Have a one on one talk with the teacher and let her know what your son has been telling you. It is possible he is doing things while the teacher isn't looking, so you need to bring her attention to it so she knows to keep a closer eye on it.

    Answer by spiritguide_23 at 11:02 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • Bullies are really smart and sly with how they pick on a child. Many times the teacher doesn't see or hear it and the kids around them won't speak up because they could be next. Go up to that school every darn day if you have to and make your face known. Let the school know if they do not do something ASAP you may have to get legal help because kids should feel safe at schools. It doesn't matter if the teacher never see's the act going on. Your child is being tormented and YOU are his voice, his advocate. Do not let the school make you feel small, like your son does not matter. GRRRRR

    Answer by pnwmom at 12:47 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • If he is still being bullied by the same child, I would follow up on that with the teacher. Also ask that the child be moved away from him. It takes time to make friends, sometimes, or it may just be an atmosphere or group that your son may not fit into....Give it some time....give him lots of love and attention....after a while, if it doesn't work out by the end of the year, you could try a new school....sometimes the schools that look good on paper aren't necessarily the best fit for our children....

    Answer by Anna92464 at 9:46 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • When my daughter was being bullied in 4th grade I sent a note to the teacher and principle saying "If you don't take care of this I will personally come to your school and take care of it myself. I have my son's baseball bat ready. Your decision." I never had to take any action after that, but I feel that if you have to act as your child's bodyguard then you just have to do it. I doubt kids will continue to harass him if they know his mommy carries a baseball bat. Or a wooden paddle. Or my mother's favorite, a floppy sandal. Or whatever.

    Answer by witchqueen at 12:18 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • Unfortunately a Catholic school can sometimes be only Catholic in name.

    I sent my kids to Catholic school for a short while. Not only were they bullied and nothing was done about it but they were very behind academically. It was heartbreaking to transfer my kids to public school (mid-year) but I'm reaping the benefits now. The public school in my neighborhood sets very high standards and has many benefits the private school didn't.

    Could public school be an option for your children?

    Answer by flatlanderjenn at 4:26 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • Thanks all. I realy like spirit guide's answer. You really named what I'm feeling. I do understand that kids, and their parents have multiple activities going on. THe email that I got just kind of really made me feel like "well, the rest of us are already getting together" ggrrrr. The school did have a big cub scout sign up night, in september, which we went to and paid up and signed up

    I haven't met the den leader yet, but will keep positive. He sent an extra wooden car kit for us to build (by SUnday) so my son can participate in the derby. Now I need to figure how to carve this block of wood without buying power tools hmmm

    As for the "bully" I actually met his mom the first day. She was so nice!! Like, oh your son is new, welcome, etc etc. Yeah, I do want to stick it out for now.

    Comment by chicanueva (original poster) at 8:39 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

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