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Would you take him out???

So my son is 4 and he is having some serious anxiety in his k-4 class. He is having constipation, stomach aches and an overall stress of practicing his name in class. He seems to have some sort of a anxiety problem that we need to address. I want to remove him and put him back in a school that is much less pressured. His teachers think he really should be writing his name ( he is only 4 and he can just not all the time) He will stress about it. I do not know what they could be saying but he is getting really worked up. They have the kids doing a least 5 to 7 worksheets and he only goes two days. He is very capable of doing the sheets but he struggles some with his name and he will ask me to help him in class to write it. It breaks my heart. He seems stressed and will not play like he normally does while at home or on play dates. He has 10 months till kindergarten and so much can happen in that time. What would do??

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Asked by allmomma at 11:31 PM on Oct. 10, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 10 (479 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I'd talk to the teachers and get a good idea of what their expectations are and what it really going on in class. Then if I felt like there would be another class better sutied for him I'd move him there.

    Answer by jessicarae787 at 11:33 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • Take him out and practice with him at home. As a preschool teacher, no child should be doing that many worksheets a day and if he is having so many physical symptoms of stress, it is not worth it. He will learn to hate school before he even gets to Kindergarten.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:33 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • I would take him out ! No child should be that stressed out about just writing his name also talk to the doctor and see if there is any kind of condition that may be doing this to him, maybe i know this sounds weird for a child but an anxiety medication? Maybe do a parent teacher conference and then the doctor and if that doesn't work do what you feel is best for your child!

    Answer by Bluesdawg02 at 11:34 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • Not a good preschool fit in my opinion. Check out other places and also practice some of these skills. If he has to repeat preschool, who cares? No big deal. His being stressed out is a big deal because it sets the tone for down the road. He needs a more nurturing place. GL

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 11:39 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • I know it may be too early to tell but have you thought that it could be dyslexia? I have dyslexia and my son is 6yr, and I  know it's hereditary, the first thing I asked the kindergarten teacher (not in front of my child) but i asked for help in watching for some signs of it, I also asked the same of his first grade teacher. I'm not talking about writing the R or S backwards but things my son does is mistake a 5 for a 2. a W for M. the word saw for was. there are other signs like does thinking outside the box come easy for him and simple things seem harder.......It's just a thought.


    Answer by northcarolinama at 11:45 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • He is 4! I have a now 5 year old doing 4 days in preschool and I don't even think that all the days combined equals that much work! Patrick can barely spell his name and no one gives him a hard time about it. they work with him. Preschool is suposed to be a learn through play time with equal amounts of learning to sit interspersed though the 3-5 hour day. Sorry find him elsewhere to go. Some YMCAs/YWCAs have great preschool programs they offer and when my oldest was in preschool that is where she went. I was very impressed, only reason the other two didn't get the oppertunity was due to moving to a small town. Ask around your comunity and see what other moms and even the traditionally school have to recomend.

    Answer by Elfinlight at 11:47 PM on Oct. 10, 2010

  • I would homeschool him. Then again, I am a homeschooler, so that is my solution to about everything. Seriously, our oldest daughter went to preschool (before I realized how unnecessary it is) and she had some shyness and anxiety issues. I teach my children to read at 4, and the teacher had no idea she even knew letters because of how she was. I mentioned to her preschool teacher that I would be homeschooling her from Kindergarten on up, and she was very against it. She insisted that a child that shy needs to be "socialized" to come out of her shell. She is 11 now, and her personality has flourished in the homeschooling environment. Her anxiety is GONE! She is practically outgoing now, participates in church and quizzing activities, and has no problem singing solos in front of a huge auditorium. It makes me wish I had been homeschooled, because being forced to be in a school never helped me overcome any of my anxiety.

    Answer by MyGiftsFromGod at 12:00 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • change schools. we just started at the montessori (not sure if they have those in your area) but it is no-pressure, learn-at-your-own-pace, every child is different type of school and i like it. i have to say, my son started a month ago and the first 3 days he liked it, then for the next 3 weeks he cried every morning about not wanting to go. i let him stay home from school one morning becaue he was sick and the next day of school he was ready and excited to go again. it sounds like he's getting too much pressure at this school.

    my son only goes 2 mornings a week but has never been to a daycare or preschool before last month. i needed to get him a little less shy and used to a classroom setting before FULLDAY kindergarten. i with they still did half day in my town...we are all make our kids grow up too fast. but i dont think i would be any good at homeschooling my kids and i think they need the interaction w/ their peers

    Answer by acounard at 1:21 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • talk with the teachers and keep practicin @ home dont take him out just keep talkin to him and working with him

    Answer by mekarevell at 9:06 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • Ok. I disagree with everyone! A child that does those things is only looking for attention. Moving him now will cause a bigger problem. He needs to learn how to cope NOW. Spend a little extra time with him doing "special things" like park or shopping just the two of you and talk to him. You will see how quickly it goes away. If you have 10 months until Kindergarten he shouldn't be writing his name YET! My kids didn't learn how to write their FULL name ALL the time until about 2-3 months before kindergarten and they are ahead in school. (9 and 6 now). If the pre-school doesn't know how to work with a child that has a little attention craving, then they shouldn't be in business anyway in my opinion :) relax. Give it a few months and if it doesn't change THEN think about changing him AFTER Christmas.

    Answer by FinaOrlando at 9:58 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

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