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How to teach your 10 year old.

Our cousin is 10. She has lived with us for almost 2 years. She had been through abuse and neglect.
My husband and I have tried so many things to help teach her. She is very stubborn, lazy, disrespectful and very hard headed. We love her so much and we want the best for her but we are so lost in how to help teach her. She hides homework and lies. She doesn't seem to care about anything.
Yes, some is her age and other is her abuse. How can I help her? Any advice or words of comfort!
Thanks moms

Answer Question
 
dez92408

Asked by dez92408 at 12:38 AM on Oct. 11, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 4 (39 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • I can answer this from both sides the child and parent. I was abused badly from 3-12years old. My last foster mom taught me a lot. It was hard for her to get through to me because all the ppl who were supposed to love and keep me safe.She would keep telling me she loved me and cared for me. I remember she would sit there for hours when I would have nightmares. She would allow me to talk while she listened.
    Now the homework might be her way of acting out. I know when I was in college my daughter would get into trouble at school to get our attention. One good thing the teacher and we put into act was the teacher and myself and her dad would email each other. Maybe you can see if the teacher could email or text (thats what we did when we didn't have internet) when she doesn't bring her homework in. She could email if she had a hard day so you could try talking with her.
    preciouschild

    Answer by preciouschild at 12:51 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • About homework.....our son had problems with it so I talked to all his teachers and set up a system where he would write down his assignments in his notebook OR the words "no homework". Then he would have the teacher sign the notebook. It took 2 seconds as he left each class. I would look in the notebook each night and see what was expected. It worked like a charm and he actually started having a better relationship with a couple of the teachers. Just one idea........
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 7:57 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • my kids teacher post homework on the internet maybe the teacher would do the same if you asked
    kina803

    Answer by kina803 at 9:36 AM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • Has she gone to counseling to deal with the abuse and neglect? Has she been tested for learning disabilities? Children that are abuse and neglected tend to have learning disabilities. A lot of her behavior can be from the abuse. She deserves the counseling to help overcome such a horrible experience.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:40 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

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