Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

am i being selfish?

ok so anyone who read my last question should have the advantage in answering this one.... with all the crap that i have put up with from my husband these past few weeks, i've decided that i need to get away from him and all things that are aiding his hurtful ways. i would like to go to fl to visit a friend for a week so that i can just get away. now my hubby is refusing to let me take my son with me. he says he will be coming down after us. so i thought fine, whatever you keep him and let me go. some of my friends have told me that its very selfish of me to just run away like that. i dont think so but im confused. i think i owe it to myself and my son to get my crap in order so that i can be the best mom i can be. help.

Answer Question
 
flying8balls21

Asked by flying8balls21 at 9:18 PM on Oct. 26, 2008 in Relationships

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • Ypu already answered your question, get away if you feel that would be best. You have to take care of your self in order to be a good mom. I just wouldnt go very far, or just for the weekend
    perksmom

    Answer by perksmom at 9:21 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • How old is your son? I would go for sure but I would not leave my kid.
    JoonBug21

    Answer by JoonBug21 at 9:22 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • Your son is under 2 yo...NO WAY IN HELL! Do not consider leaving your child behind. If your husband is serious about leaving you (I read your other question) then I wouldn't give him the opportunity to take your child or question your parenting. If it does end up in divorce court, his lawyers may manipulate what was meant to be some time for you to gather your thoughts into attempted abandonment. I'm NOT saying that is what you're doing, but lawyers are crafty and custody issues can get messy. Don't give him ANYTHING to use against you. And honestly, let him come to FL...it will get him away from this other woman and maybe give you two some time to talk things through without her as a distraction.
    Jessy0419

    Answer by Jessy0419 at 9:25 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • Not selfish at all!! When I hear about moms that do terrible things, I wonder if they had any support and why no one noticed the problem before. (Not that your going to do something awful). Every mom needs help. Saying you need a break is a great way to avoid any further problems! When you tell your husband that your leaving for a certain amount of time so that you can regroup is not running away or being selfish.

    I would worry about your husband not letting you take you baby. I didn't read your last question but that is a big problem in itself.

    jcsscfam5

    Answer by jcsscfam5 at 9:26 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • my son is 17 months, and i want to take him with me. and i guess you would really have to know his father to completely understand when i say he wont let me. but i do feel its best if i get away. i need to. and i only wish the so wasnt such a stubborn prick.
    flying8balls21

    Answer by flying8balls21 at 9:27 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • I agree that u probably need a break but i wouldn't go 3 a wk. Do u have another friend you can visit to maybe catch a movie or have a few drinks with?
    LovingParent08

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 9:30 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • Leave when DH is at work. If you think he'd be violent you need to get out regardless.
    Jessy0419

    Answer by Jessy0419 at 9:30 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • Trust me I know. My DH is the same way. But I would stay and suffer forever before I left my kid. Im REALLY overprotective and my DD is my world.
    JoonBug21

    Answer by JoonBug21 at 9:36 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • as long as you know he is safe and will be properly cared for then by all means, get yourself together. Sometimes it's important to do just that.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:45 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

  • I do agree it sounds like you need to get away for awhile...BUT...I don't agree with leaving your son with your SO, if you leave he can go to court and get custody! Do not leave without taking your child!!!
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 9:47 PM on Oct. 26, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN