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4 Bumps

meals

I would like to know if anyone has the same problem or who is right.I believe that kids should not go hungry. But husband will make something at breakfast only one or two girls will eat. The others will not.If not eat,don't eat, then rewarm for lunch, if no eat no eat then will rewarm again for dinner. If no eat then go hundry again. Till they eat it but I disagree and want the kids to eat something. Who is right,wrong? any advice. anyone has the same problem and a solution cause when I try to step in I get told to butt out.

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momindiana

Asked by momindiana at 2:44 PM on Oct. 11, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Level 22 (13,326 Credits)
Answers (21)
  • Wow. This sounds like a horror movie.
    These kids must be pretty strong willed. Does he have any other strange or extreme rules?
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 2:47 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I agree with your husband... I make ONE meal, it is their decision whether or not to eat. They will not starve from missing a couple of meals. I simply can not believe that parents have lost the common sense not to MAKE their kids into picky eaters... Its sad.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 2:48 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I don't like the thought of kids going hungry either, and I also don't believe in forcing kids to eat things they don't want to. What I do in our house is this-- if the kids do not want/like the meal I fix they have the option of heating up their own food-- their choices are a frozen tv dinner, a can of soup or a pbj sandwich.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 2:49 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I disagree with it, but I know families who do that. I wouldn't give them something different, but bringing out the same thing meal after meal after meal seems like torture to me. But if they are extremely picky then maybe it would be a good way to get them to stop. We usually say they can't have anything else until the next meal. My kids are really picky. Maybe something like that would be better if there is a set reasonable ending point to it, like no more than one day.
    mybella81

    Answer by mybella81 at 2:49 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I make what I know my kids will enjoy. Really is it that hard to scramble eggs and throw a waffle in the toaster?
    mompam

    Answer by mompam at 2:53 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I believe that children have a strong, innate instinct to avoid dangerous foods... so if they consistently refuse to eat something in particular, I suspect they have a good reason to do so.

    Which is to say: after breakfast is over, if they want to eat something they can eat breakfast until lunch. When lunch is served, they are served lunch, and breakfast is discarded. Same with lunch: if they don't eat it, it's left for them (in the fridge) until dinner, at which time it is discarded.

    It helps if there is NOTHING in the house that isn't good, healthy, real food. Because not-very-hungry children have the ability to hold out for the 'good stuff' (salty, fatty, sweetened crap), so if it's just not available, the issue fails to come up. The adults can't hide a stash, kids always know.

    If someone heated me up the same meal the third time, they'd be lucky to live through the night. That is just disrespectful.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:53 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I am a believer of "You eat what is put in front of you or you don't eat." Period. If they're old enough they are allowed to make their own food, but I am not making 10 different meals for everyone. You get what is made, you make your own, or you go hungry.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 2:55 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I serve different meals, but i do have the take it or leave it option. Missing a meal won't hurt them. My kids will usually just give in and eat though
    Bubbie0809

    Answer by Bubbie0809 at 3:00 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I think both you and your husband are a little extreme. I don't think 'kids should not go hungry' if they are refusing perfectly good food. It won't hurt a child to miss a meal or two to learn not to be picky. But I also don't believe in forcing kids to eat something they clearly don't like as your husband is doing. At our house, we serve a nutritious, high-quality meal and we don't do substitutions. If they don't finish a reasonable portion of it, then they better not ask for snacks, etc after letting good food go to waste. If they complain they are hungry, we tell them they should have eaten their meal if they were hungry. But at the same time this doesn't enter a power struggle with them like your husband is doing or make them eat something they really truly don't like.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 3:07 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

  • I like Linda's idea..it is a good compromise.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 3:23 PM on Oct. 11, 2010

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