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2 Bumps

family drama

We have a big family that is all very close, all of my cousins and i grew up together and every week we have a family dinner at my grandmas. I have 2 girl cousins who are both 15 years old ( who this post is about)

They are the same age ( 15) and grew up close but now they are changing. K is popular and into sports and friends. M use to be that way but now she is getting into a "gothic" stage, and doesnt have many friends.


M started having problems at school because of a boy he was almost stalking her , and he is kicked out of school from threatning a teacher, one day he sent her a text message to get her to skip school with him and when she wouldnt he cut his wrist and took a pic of it and sent it to her. Her parents havent really tried to do anything about it besides telling her to ignore him. she then started cutting herself and then last week made a "hitlist" and got kicked out of school ( continued)

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:21 AM on Oct. 12, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (7)
  • BUT it is obviouse she just mad the hitlist to get out of school ( and away from the boy) ..she even turned it in herself ( if she was really going to do it why would she turn it in herself) .. So she gets kicked out of school... Her moma nd dad dont want anyone to know but it is obvious why when she gets kicked out of school and we loive in a small town and everyone knows "someone" was kicked out of school for making a hitlist ( put 2 and 2 together) and everyone in the family now knows...

    BUT instead of helping her or getting her some help her mom and dad are trying to "cover up" what she has done by trying to get everyone to focus and be made at other cousin K ( who recently came out and said she thinks she is gay) .... ( They think that is worse than making a hit list).

    Anyways M has said she wants therepy and needs help but her parents wont do it ( they are more focused on how it will look) what can we do ?
    2lilbumblebees

    Answer by 2lilbumblebees at 9:26 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • Wow. I would be concerned about both kids. Now that you know about this and know the parents are not doing anything about it, its your call in intervine and do something about it. Too many kids are hurting themselves as an out cry for help! and she seriously needs some help and attention before it gets real out of hand and someone is seriously hurt. I would reach out to her, her parents and the boys parents. We are not in this situation and its up to you to decide if you want to help her in time of desperate need.
    KayGia0704

    Answer by KayGia0704 at 9:32 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • The only thing I can suggest is try talking to her parents, as a family, and if they still refuse, see if there is something that you guys, as a family, can do to help her. I wish you luck and hope things works out of for your cousins.
    QueenMomma2023

    Answer by QueenMomma2023 at 9:39 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • What about talking to older people in the family about getting together and making these parents deal with this.
    whoreallycares

    Answer by whoreallycares at 3:21 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • Both of these young ladies need some love and support. Be there for them as an older adult to guide them through this rocky period in their life. I know that I had a really hard time as a teen and most of what my parents did to try to guide me was not very helpful at best and harmful at times. I was grateful to have the love and support of other adults in my life (my aunt, my best friend's mom, my cousin and his wife) who helped me get through that rough time and learn to stand on my own two feet. Sometimes when teens' parents are just dropping the ball, I think it can be more useful to the teens to approach it this way by just helping them become independent and get throught the next few years until adulthood on their own terms thant to try to fix the parenting at that late date. You can't change them, just help her deal with it.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 9:54 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • gl
    mekarevell

    Answer by mekarevell at 12:46 PM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • hmm good luck mmomma
    san78

    Answer by san78 at 6:05 AM on Feb. 15, 2011

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