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"Wow! I never pictured you as submissive."

Is what my bff told me last weekend after she spent time with me and SO. She had never been around us together. I am a very controlling person but don't feel the need with him since he always has my best interests at heart.
I was just surprised to hear her say this.
Do you allow your SO to make the decisions without hesitation? Or do you feel that you have to have your say in all of it if he doesn't ask?

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Asked by Jademom07 at 10:21 AM on Oct. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Level 34 (64,323 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • We always discuss things before we do them..

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 10:22 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • Hmmm...I would pretty much trust my BF, but, I know that he would talk to me and ask what I think anyway, so, I don't have to let him do it all.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 10:23 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • For the most part, I'm pretty submissive, but when it comes to the kids he leaves the decisions to me, and backs me up. We didn't plan it that way, it just kind of worked out that way......

    I agree that when you know they have your best interest in mind you can release that control. I actually like it that way.

    Answer by ohwrite at 10:24 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • We take turns honestly. Unspoken turns. I take the lead at times, he takes the lead at times and then many times we stand together and make decisions together. :)

    Answer by Memigen at 10:28 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • We talk about things. I let him take the lead sometimes, and sometimes he lets me. Sometimes I let him take the lead even when I really think something should be otherwise, knowing that he'll come around to my way of thinking :)
    That would bother me, being called "submissive"! But I guess I can be... and I guess the reality of being married is that we aren't such independent women anymore! Ah, the hard truth.

    Answer by sfwilson at 10:36 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • He is more opinionated than i am with certain things. There are things that i let him "take control" of because i could care less. But, there are other things in which i definitely have my say in & he is OK with that. So, i guess we both sometimes take the lead. BUT, if we are at a disagreement, we bust out a pen & paper & write pro's & cons together if it is applicable, which it usually is.

    He usually leads in the bedroom!

    Answer by samurai_chica at 10:44 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • He usually makes the decisions.

    Answer by matthewscandi at 10:51 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • well he usually asks me about everything. like should we pay the car payment in full this week or can he go play ball sundays. its pretty good communication in that part but we still have some problems. i think the man should make the decisions to a point but always give his so a say so even if he doesnt exactly use it

    Answer by Tiffany_Rivera_ at 10:57 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • My STBX couldn't make decisions, I had to. I hated that even simple things he would leave it up to me. Just pick a damn restaurant or something - it was frustrating at times.

    Answer by rio_burb at 11:43 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • Honestly its never been an issue. He's always sought my opinion and I wouldn't have it any other way. Quite honestly, submissive women annoy me.

    Answer by SalemWitchChild at 11:51 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

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