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8 Bumps

Am I wrong? (Sex) adult content

My husband thinks he should "run" things (in other words be in control) in the bedroom. I have no problem with that. But he also says that means he gets sex when he wants it, and how he wants it no matter what. He doesn't even care if the kids are awake. They are 22 months and 3 yrs old. I told him we should wait until they are asleep, but he wants it,when he does.He also takes that to mean that if he "runs" things then I have to do whatever he wants or says even if I don't want to. Am I wrong to deny him sex on demand. I love sex I just don't like it to feel like a chore. Plus he drinks and when he gets drunk that turns me off and I dont want to have sex with him cause I don't like smelling or tasting the alcohol. If I wanted that I'd drink it myself. At times he will tell me he is going to video us and I dont want to. Am I wrong not to give in to his every sexual want and sex on demand?

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PiscesMommy021

Asked by PiscesMommy021 at 11:16 AM on Oct. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Level 7 (154 Credits)
Answers (37)
  • He needs to chill out! He doesn't run anything.. You are a couple.. he is not the runner and you his bitch.. Tell him to wake the fuck up & quit being an asshole!
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 11:18 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • You are capable of making your own choices. As a husband he has a obligation to take your feelings into consideration. If he is demanding this then he is an ass! You are not a posession and you have the right to turn him down flat on his ass.
    Tell him if he wants to be a master, he can go find a slave and you will take the kids and 1/2 of all the possessions and money.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 11:18 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • You're not wrong at all.

    In my relationship, (this may sound corny) I don't have "sex". We always make love. It's always passionate and nothing but love.

    I will not give in whenever he wants. He knows that once the kids are asleep or not home, that's "Mommy & Daddy time" and anything gors then. :)
    AtHomeMommy-3

    Answer by AtHomeMommy-3 at 11:18 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • Oh my, have you talked to him about this. Doesn't he want you to enjoy it. Tell him its damaging to the kids to you taking care of daddy. Does he say he will go elsewhere if you don't?
    mamakrysoftwo

    Answer by mamakrysoftwo at 11:18 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • this man sounds like trouble! I'd get away from him if I were you, it all sounds like this could turn into a very bad situation, particularly if you have kids.

    that and if he is talking about videotaping you, he may do so in secret, and don't be surprised if it gets posted so the whole world can see it!
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 11:19 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • No. Sex should be a collaboration between you so that you both enjoy yourselves. A demanding jackass like this needs put in his place, in my opinion. He's being rude and inconsiderate, and that is not what sex should be about.
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 11:19 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • How long have you been married?
    Katalina471

    Answer by Katalina471 at 11:20 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • Woah!! Your are NOT his sex slave. You def. have a say when these sexual acts will and will not take place... you need to let him know he is NOT in control of you like that. He needs to respect if you don't like or our not comfortable with something.. at the same time you have to be willing to comprimise (at times)
    JuLiAnSmOmMy317

    Answer by JuLiAnSmOmMy317 at 11:21 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • SUppermommy said it all. He does not run things..he is being a controlling a**. You are a partnership and its your body. If he is respectful and you want to show him love then you can give it to him. Does he control other stuff? Does he have a drinking problem?
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 11:21 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • I don't think you are wrong, I think that sex is a huge issue, and you have to work out "rules" that you're both comfortable with. I tend to give "sex on demand" to my husband, but he is generally considerate of things that he knows I'm not comfortable with.

    This is a tough issue, and really important in marriage even if people think it "shouldn't be'. Was he like this before you were married or is this new? I tend to give my husband what he wants when he wants it, but he doesn't really want to do things if he knows it's not exciting for me, or makes me uncomfortable.

    Your sex life is for both of you, and you both need to feel comfortable with it, or it won't work.......
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 11:22 AM on Oct. 12, 2010

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