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need help standing ground.

I need help telling people no. I feel bad if I can't help someone, so I normally say Yes and over do it.

Today I said no. But I feel bad, and want to turn around and say yes. I help friends by watching their kids, and so my kids dont' get to spend a lot of one on one time with me. I just want to put a big sign on my door that says "LEAVE ME ALONE" for a while....ugh

How are you able to say no so easily without feeling bad?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:57 PM on Oct. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Just say no and people will stop EXPECTING everything from you. You can't do everything and you and your family need your own time. Good luck
    bjojola

    Answer by bjojola at 2:58 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • You say no because you are saying yes to yourself and your needs. Are you feeling guilt, bad, sad, hurt, disapointed? Are you emotions reasonable? What can you do to help sooth your emotions? Like feeling guilty about not babysitting, but you reaallly need a "me moment"...by understanding you can not do everything for everybody, and their own emotions are theirs to work out.

    Put yourself first, it's not greedy to take care of yourself. If you are not in top shape, any help you give someone else willing would not be in top shape either.
    isabellalecour

    Answer by isabellalecour at 3:04 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • I don't have to worry about anyone asking me to keep kids, They all know if their children are at my house they are expected to listen
    Sheleekieije

    Answer by Sheleekieije at 3:39 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • people just have to understand that you cant always help them all the time yeah you might feel bad but they will get over it just be honest with them & say no you have other plans & cant to do it
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 4:03 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • Read the book "When I say No I feel guilty" - it will help you (it has been around a long time, so might have to check out the library, but it is a very good book !!!
    JustMyOpinion22

    Answer by JustMyOpinion22 at 7:25 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

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