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SAHMs (or other moms that do the majority of the house cleaning): does your family make any effort to make things easier for you during the day?

I'm really fed up with my husband right now. Sure he works (sometimes 12-16 hours a day) but does that really give him the right to not care and make more work for me?

We have mandatory recycling in our town. No big deal but everything has to be rinsed out. Instead of rinsing out his beer bottles and cans he just throws them in the trash. Then I have to dig them out, rinse and put them in the recycling. At the most he leaves them near the sink (that took 3 weeks of nagging to get him to do that). He refuses to put paper in the recycling bin which is right inside the garage (door is in the kitchen). He throws it in the trash.
he refuses to put his dirty clothes in the hamper, just tosses them anywhere including in my clean clothes. He won't lift the toilet seat (pees all over it and the floor and leaves it). Won't flush. Won't put his dirty dishes in the dishwasher (puts them in my clean sink). I'm so tired of it.

Answer Question

Asked by justanotherjen at 3:56 PM on Oct. 12, 2010 in Home & Garden

Level 26 (28,174 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • yep... they leave. Ha ha ha

    Answer by sahlady at 3:57 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • im a single mother of a 4 year old and 1 year old... what is help? (they do try though... even the one year old picks up toys when she sees me and big brother... its so cute!)

    Answer by mommy06and09 at 3:59 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • My kids are slightly better than my husband. At least when I yell at them they are somewhat obligated to hop to it and clean up otherwise they get grounded. My husband just gets mad and helps even less.
    My almost 8yo daughter is a blessing, though. She is so freaking helpful I don't know what I'd do without her. I was sick last week and she volunteered to clean the kitchen. She emptied the dishwasher (with the 4yo's help), cleaned the counters, straightened up and swept...twice!
    But then she also left her dirty clothes all over the bathroom floor after her bath, they leave their toothbrushes all over the sink, never put their hair brushes back where they belong, won't flush the toilet (EVER), leave their stuff all over the house and ignore me half the time. Sigh. I need a vacation (or a good nap).

    Comment by justanotherjen (original poster) at 4:03 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • My husband does help, as do my kids. Maybe you need to make your own vacation and go on strike! As for the things that get left out I'd confiscate those and let them earn them back by doing extra chores. At 7 or 8 my oldest daughter was terrible about leaving out dirty clothes or stashing them, so I confiscated all her clothes except for one outfit that she didn't like that much and then I taught her how to wash clothes. She got tired of wearing the same thing everyday and did some extra chores to earn back her clothes. I'm not sure it would work on younger kids, but my husband once took a picture of an unflushed toilet and told my daughter he was going to post it on the internet or take it to school to show her friends and that put a stop to unflushed toilets.  GL! I hope you did get a break.


    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 4:16 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • I also heard a story about a man with 7 daughters who got tired of the missing hairbrushes, combs, hirdryer, etc. He anchored them all to the wall with some kind of cord so they couldn't be taken any further than a few feet. I thought that was kind of funny...and smart!

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 4:19 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • my kids are young and there is 4 of them ( and 1 on the way) But DH is active army, and we live on post, but when he gets home he takes over the kid stuff, and on weekends everything is a group effort ( which is alot b/c i am a clean freak)

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 7:05 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • My kids are too little to help, unless you call a 2 year old picking up a few dolls help. My dh thinks that he helps, but really he does very little. It is almost the only thing we fight about, but I hate confrontation, so it is usually when I am super mad and that makes it all worse. I finally came up with a way to ask for him to do more, I decided that I would ask like a man. I read him a list of what I wanted him to do every week and let him agree/disagree with each. He agreed to all, we modified some things and that was it. Its been 2 weeks and most of my list is being done, but he still hasn't collected the garbage in over a week..... he did fold the load of laundry I left for him last night, but only after I finally decided to put the basket right where he watches tv. A work in progress.

    Answer by christinab313 at 7:21 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

  • My husband is nothing like that. We have a cabinet under our oven that he put in one of those pull out things and it has both the regular trash and the recycling. We put the lid down on the toilet seat that way everyone has to lift and put back something, so he always lifts the seat. And he mostly puts his dirty clothes in the hamper. He has shorts that he wears around the house, so he leaves those laying by his side of the bed. I do end up picking them up on laundry day, but for the most part he puts his dirty clothes in the hamper. However, my husband doesn't like a super messy house. He's not a neat freak, but he doesn't like clothes laying all over the place and I sure as hell wouldn't pick them up.
    My daughter is 13 months old, so she is too young to really help.

    Answer by Christina807 at 10:59 PM on Oct. 12, 2010

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