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What would you do?

Ok so my hubby and I had a fight last night. I'm a SAHM and he told me that I'm lazy and don't do a good enough job keeping the house clean. I clean the darn house everyday! Our son is crawling so there's toys all over the floor and our house is small so all the baby stuff makes it seem cluttered. Nothing I can do about that. So here's my question..... your hubby calls you lazy and you know you're not. Do you refuse to cook and clean for a couple days OR do you clean like a mad woman to see if you might actually get a compliment for once? I'm having a hard time trying to decide what to do here so tell me you thoughts.

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Asked by BabyBreyen at 12:46 PM on Oct. 27, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (10)
  • I would tell him if he doesn't like how you are doing things let him try it. I bet he would understand after an hour!

    Answer by Christinemg0813 at 12:48 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • lol I tried that and he just yelled more and said that I don't work and he does so he shouldn't have to help with housework.

    Answer by BabyBreyen at 12:50 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I think I would tell him I am not his mother or his maid. I am his partner - partners help each other. And if he thought he could do it better that I would be glad to go out to work & he could stay at home and do it all.

    Answer by lanckn at 12:52 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • Wow this sounds like my S/O to a tee!!! Anyway when he gets on his rant about me being lazy and not keeping the house clean enough I tell him that im home with 3 kids all day and pregnant y doesnt he try it sometime......It hurts my feelings and he knows it and he knows that it will give me a jump start to get something done!! I wouldnt stop cooking and cleaning it will just make him think he is right about you being lazy he wont see it as revenge!! I KNOW ITS HARD GOOD LUCK AND STAY STRONG!!

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 12:55 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • That is just bull when they use that as an excuse. My husband works and I'm a SAHM. He helps me with the cleaning, cooking and the baby. You are a domestic engineer and if you were given a salary for what you do it would be 100k plus a year. Some men don't get how hard it is to stay at home with a child and do the cooking cleaning and run errands. A relationship is like partnership and everything should be 50/50. What does your husband do for a living? If he is a construction worker, that would be the only reason why I wouldn't ask for help with the housework.

    Answer by nora17 at 12:57 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • My SO and I had this argument a few months back. The difference is that we BOTH work full time, but I work 3 days a week for 12 hours and he has to work Monday through Friday. So he made some comment about me "helping out around the house more." I flipped shit on him and said if we're both working then it would be an equal effort and that he can try bending over the washer with a pregnant belly and getting out of breath when vaccuuming and see how easy it was!!! I didn't just STOP cleaning though, I made an effort and we worked things out.

    Answer by K_Coleman at 2:17 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I'd tell mine to kiss my ass but that's just how we are. I'm a SAHM but not by choice. I love being with my son but I'm not the housewife type and he knows that! We just cant afford daycare at the moment. We make a deal to both pick up after ourselves so if his crap is in his way thats his problem. The only thing he accuses me of is "sleeping all day". I WISH I got to sleep all day! His job is very physically demanding so I give him SOME credit. But I don't know much about your husband so I can't say. I'd try cleaning like a mad woman for a day and see if he doesn't notice. If not, give up! Why waste your time trying to make him happy if he doesn't seem to appreciate it?

    Answer by jessicarae787 at 2:20 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • You just do what you would normally do on any other day. If what he says is not true, then you have nothing to prove, and there is no need to try to punish him for stating his opinion. His opinion is that you are not doing enough. Your opinion is that you are doing all you can do. All you have is a difference of opinions. My husband and I have a difference of opinion about something almost every day. It's really no big deal.

    Answer by NannyB. at 2:57 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • My husband called me lazy so i got mad and said if you think i don't clean now i'll stop doing what i do everyday then you'll see how messy the house would really be. He shut up after that but i still get pissed of about that.Men are stupid they think just because they go to work and make the money they do everything. But if they actually had to stay home with the kids all day and clean and do the laundry and change diapers they probly wouldn't bitch at us that much. They think it's so easy.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:00 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • i tell him to STFU and if he wants to get food or his laundry clean he'll have more respect for the one who's raising the kids!

    Answer by chyna_doll at 5:19 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

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