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What can my daughter do with her 6 year old son that continues to mis behave.

My daughters son never wants to mind her. His father is not in his life as much as he would like and he acts out by not listening to his mother. We have had talks with him about his behavior and he says he'll be good but he continues to not want to behave. She gets really frustrated with him and he makes her cry and this really upsets me. She does everything for him and he treats her like crap. Any ideas on what she can do to get him to be a good boy?

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GamerMomma51

Asked by GamerMomma51 at 9:01 AM on Oct. 13, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 2 (12 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • She may want to consider family counseling for her & her son. A counselor could help her to set up a behavioral plan she can stick with. Clear expectations & consistency are going to be key.
    mom2aspclboy

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 9:07 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • Does she get frustrated and give in? Most parents won't admit that they do this, but many do when they are over stressed & having a hard time dealing with a fresh child. They give up & say "OK". All this does, is teach the child that their ill behavior will eventually get him what he wants. Does he watch TV? Or play video games or have play dates? Take them away. He can have them back when he shows that he can behave. You have to find SOMETHING to have leverage over him. Whether it be toys, TV, junk food, video games. He MUST have something that he adores. If he is acting up, she needs to take that right away from him. She does not need to get angry, or shout. Just take it away & explain to him that ifhe can get it back when he learns correct behavior. Leverage works wonders on children. And, the more she gives into him, the more he'll act out. She needs to follow through...that is the only way children learn.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:11 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • That is really good advice mom2 gave you!
    older

    Answer by older at 9:12 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • my daughter is going threw this no one loves me stage and she will slam doors and stuff she is also 6 so what i find that works is when she starts to not listen to me or act realy bad i will ask her to come over to me and i will tickel her and just try to make it fun so she will get a new aditude and then i can ask her to do something and she will i will also explane to her what she did is wrong good luck to your daughter
    devinalexis

    Answer by devinalexis at 9:12 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • Time, time and more time. Be with him as much as she can and I mean DO stuff with him; chat, play games, walk, watch TV, make cookies. Be a friendly mom. Kids really pick up on how sincerely they are respected and wanted around. Playing up may get negative attention from a mom but it's better than no attention. Kids need to connect, belong and have structure and positive plans.

    Obviously I don't know you or your GS so I'm giving my opinon as a generalisation.
    PinkLentil

    Answer by PinkLentil at 9:13 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • Sounds like some discipline is needed.
    mom2queenie2004

    Answer by mom2queenie2004 at 9:13 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • see with children we have to play thy reverse psychology, teach them that they cant get something for nothing and when i mean something its not rewarding them with a gift all thy time, because they will be expecting it , I'm talking about a praise or a thank you hug and / or quality time with them, see when a child acts out and you jump to there every needs, knowingly that there OK, but yet they want it wright there, wright now, no it's, buts or whats and we do it just to quiet them down and / or your out in public and it gets to the point where it becomes humiliating, and one does what they want just to quiet them down,stop them from actting out ,etc... no matter what thy situation, he will continue to behave that way, i say, stand your ground, if he wants to cry, let him cry,put him on time out,but also explain to him why he is on time out and everytime he tends to move from thy spot put him back and , its called tuff love
    changachula1234

    Answer by changachula1234 at 9:28 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • It is called taking this child "Out of Eden". STOP doing everything for him today. Take all toys and non-essentials from his room today. Tell him the dr said he must be acting out because he is not getting enough rest and start putting him to bed at least 30 min earlier than he has been going. Absolutley no special activities until a major attitude change has occurred. She can not allow him to get her upset to the point of tears and frustrated. Father or no father she has to be the mother and stop taking this.
    treynlisa

    Answer by treynlisa at 9:42 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • son WHO continues to disobey.....not "son that continues to disobey".
    Enough sleep and a healthy diet is a good start. And a peaceful,quiet ,relaxed household also, Some kids are tired and stressed and can't stand all the noise and activity. They act out when they see Mom upset and yelling. They need a routine. Meals at the same time each day (No fast food) and bedtime at the same time every night. Read to him just before bedtime. It relaxes children.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:47 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

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