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My ex is making me feel like a bad mother

My son gets sinus infections every year in the fall and in the spring. I got a call from the school nurse on Friday that he had a fever and was coughing. I was at work and my mother had off so I called her. She picked him up. Friday night, Saturday and Sunday, he went on and off with the fever-it never went above 101. He had all the same things as when he would get sinus infections. I treated it the way I always did as the doctor usually only prescribes antibotics when all else had failed. By Monday, I called the doctor as he did not seem to be getting better. Well, he had pneumonia. When I called my ex, he was pissed that I hadn't taken him to the doctoer sooner. His new wife was making all sort of comments in the back ground. Anyway, I had a meeting at work yesterday and my job is NOT flexible. My DH has the ability to work from home. We decided he would stay home yesterday and I would today. cont


Asked by Anonymous at 11:36 AM on Oct. 13, 2010 in Kids' Health

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I wouldn't sweat it Momma. I didn't believe my son when he said he was sick once and I REFUSED to take him to the doctor's, I truly thought he was faking because he begged me the night before to stay home from work so he didn't have to go to the sitters. My Mom took him to the hospital and I got a call that I had to get to the hospital because he needed surgery. He was having his appendix removed as soon as I signed the papers! I felt so bad!
    I think that it sounds like the new wife is being pissy about the situation and he is mirroring her complaints onto you! Just let the comments roll off of you and eventually he will get sick of her complaining and tell her to stop it! Don't let either of them tell you or that you are a bad Momma and do not second guess youself!

    Answer by Peajewel at 7:11 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • well, my ex was ticked that i didn't stay home yesterday and was making comments about me trying to send him to school today. I wasn't going to send him to school! He needed to be home another day. It would have created a real hardship if I had to stay home yesterday and my DH has taken turns staying home with him before.
    My ex used to take turns as well, but recently, he has stopped pitching in, but has become more vocal about what he thinks I do wrong. Just last week he send me a nasty text about a pair of jeans not fitting. I bought a whole bunch of the SAME jeans in the SAME size. One must have been mis sized and they did not fit. He said "I pay you enough in child support, you can buy him clothign that fit." when I questioned him he said that he has never had a problem with clothes fitting before and he did check and agreed that all three pair of jeans I had sent were the same brand the and same size. ARGHH!!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:41 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • It sounds like the problem is probably the new wife. She may resent the child support, or have insecurities regarding you, who knows, but if you and the ex were getting along better before they got married, then I would say the new tensions are probably being caused by the new wife.

    All you can really do is continue being the best mom you can be.....there is no reason for your ex to complain if your husband is willing to stay home with your child, or your's up to you, and if you trust the person, he has no say. As for the clothing, sounds petty to me.......

    My heart is with you, I've been there with my oldest sons dad....he's 28 now, and I can't tell you what a weight was taken off of my shoulders when he turned 18....a sad thing to say because you don't want them to grow up too fast. *hugs* momma.

    Answer by ohwrite at 11:48 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • Then why doesn't he take care of him if he thinks you aren't doing it right. Take him with a grain of salt and do your thing. You know your child. No one MAKES you feel like a bad mom, only if you let them. ;)

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 11:50 AM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • It sounds like your ex just wants cause problems. My ex only pays $50 in child support a month, and that's when he feels like it. He had a comment about seeing me in public with my african american brother in law, thinking he was my boyfriend. Obviously he just wants to complain. I wouldn't worry too much- you're doing the best you can.

    Answer by Annabel1809Lee at 11:52 AM on Oct. 13, 2010