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How do u explain the deseiced to a 4yr old?

My Daughter Recently seen a pic of her great gmom who passed when she was 1 1/2 she is now 4 n i explained she is in heaven now....& for some reason she is now scared to go to the bathroom by herself because i explainded that her gmom loved her n is watching over her....now she is afraid....any ideias???

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babyjizmalife

Asked by babyjizmalife at 12:29 PM on Oct. 13, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 6 (-63 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • that they are gone now and cannot come back. Their heart is no longer beating. in the case of an elderly person, it got tired and stopped as happens to most of us.
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 12:30 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • We never went in to all the "spiritual" aspects with our kids - although that's generally a rule in our house - but we simply don't think that's something they need to try and comprehend when most adults can't wrap their head around it (and because my DH and I don't agree on those things).

    Anyways, we simply explained to them that when someone dies they aren't with us any more. We explained to them that when they break a toy and it goes a way it's "dead." It's not hurting, it's not sick, but it can't come back. We can still love those toys and we can still miss them, but they are gone. Then we explained that when people or animals die, it's the same thing, they aren't in pain, they aren't sick, and we can still miss and love them, but they are gone and can't come back.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 12:33 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • Very good point thank you.!
    babyjizmalife

    Comment by babyjizmalife (original poster) at 12:36 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • When someone dies they stop breathing, and they go away forever. Like everything else in this world, it gets tired out and has to stop working.
    I would NEVER tell my kids that they were being watched by a loved one, that is just creepy, and I can understand why she would be afraid. You should take the time to explain that once someone is gone, they are gone for good, and can't come back.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 12:36 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • My 4yo just went to her first funeral. 94 yo granny. She wrapped herself around it just fine believe it or not. She told me she was sleeping, and is in heaven now. She doesn't need her body anymore so we buried it. She's not upset, scared or anything else. She very matter of fact. There is nothing wrong with telling her your loved one watches after her if YOU truly believe that, but maybe explain to here that she's keeping her safe and protecting her, like an angel.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 12:43 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • perhaps rephrase just watching over to : "watching over her when she needs her to" might help her give over that.

    Personally I'm atheist, so I'm going to be explaining the "heaven" concept, so I'm not really sure of other advice that may help.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 11:34 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

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