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5 Bumps

Right to die...

OK, I'm watching "The Bold & the Beautiful" right now and one of the story lines is that Stephanie, the family matriarch, has just been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. She's up in years (70s?) and has chosen to forgo treatment and have fun living out the rest of her days. The only people who know are her doctor, her DIL (who she hates) and her ex-DIL (who she likes slightly better). Both DILs are after her to get treatment...basically torture her body to gain a few more months. Stephanie can't get it through their heads she's ready to die.

I wanna slap both these b!tches. I firmly believe in the Right to Die, and in a sound-minded person's right to refuse medical treatment if they so choose. (Especially a 70something with a terminal disease.)

What are your thoughts? How would you handle an elder family member in this situation?
What's more important, QUANTITY of years lived? or QUALITY of the life lead?


Asked by MamaK88 at 1:46 PM on Oct. 13, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 33 (62,090 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • With Stage 4 cancer, the treatment is often as bad as, if not worse, than the disease. So what, really, is the option here?

    Go through a horrible, debilitating disease that ends with pain and suffering, but still have some quality of life up to a point where you can make your peace w/ people


    go through a horrible, debilitating treatment for a horrible, debilitating disease, spend months in pain, suffering, going bald, puking your guts out, be too weak to even get out of bed every day, and eke out a couple extra months in total misery and die broke?

    Hm.... what a choice.

    Answer by geminilove at 2:13 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • I believe its only the person (if in sound mind) to decide what should happen. I also believe in assisted suicide, it may sound harsh but look at it from the persons point of view. I'm ancient, I'm frail and broken. My husband is dead. My life is complete. I can't do anything because the only thing left of ME is my mind. I WANT TO DIE! But no Society says, we have to keep them alive as long as possible with machines and they have to take their medicine to prolong the inevitable. We have animal abuse and put animals out of their misery when they have suffered, WHY can't we do the same to people?.....but yet, we have the death's it any different?

    Answer by HTMommy at 1:57 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • I find it horridly selfish for anyone to try and force someone to take medication or fight for life if they choose not to. If someone is to a point in their life where death seems like the best option, no one else should have the right to take that away from them. People get angry with me because I have DNR papers in place and make a point to have them on file at all local hospitals. And I also always make a point to make sure my doctors know they are not to place me on life support of any kind, and my DH has the paperwork to back up those choices. To me, Quality trumps Quantity, and I would choose death for anyone over misery or pain or illness, including myself and my loved ones.

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 1:50 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • I would help them live it up the time they have left. We would build a bucket list and go nuts.

    Answer by Memigen at 1:51 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • Nobody should have to suffer and everyone should be allowed to face their own death with dignity and live out their final days with the best quality of life possible.

    Answer by Izsarejman at 1:52 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • I would respect a person's decision to not put their body through treatment and live the rest of their lives the best they can....dying with dignity with pain management the goal......I don't agree with Euthanasia, though, and I think that sometime the Right to die can culturally turn into an "obligation" to in, you are being selfish by wanting to fight this battle, putting a financial burden on your family....that attitude has started in our culture and it scares me...

    Answer by Anna92464 at 1:57 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • I think it is all about the quality of life lived. How much you have loved and been loved in return. If they are in their right mind, totally sane and such, they have the right to decide (as long as they are old enough and mature enough, so I'm obviously not talking about kids) whether they want to try and beat it, slow it down, or just totally let it take them. We are not God and should not pretend to be or play God with other people's lives.

    Answer by QueenMomma2023 at 2:15 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • I think quality of the life lead is much more important, if I ever saw myself in that scenario, I would refuse too.

    Answer by older at 2:28 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • In March of this year my husband's grandmother was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer. Given the facts about treatment and her chances of recovery she chose to forgo any life pro-longing procedures and live what little time she has left to the best of her ability. When I first heard about her decision I was angry with her for not fighting it. I was angry that a woman who has given the world such joy could be taken from us in such a cruel way. It was a selfish anger. I knew that at the time but I know it even more now. Charlotte knows she is dying and she's accepted it. She has helped everyone around her accept it too by making sure that we have no regrets for things we decided to put off in our life. She deserves to live what is left of her life in whatever way she wants and she wants to live it out with the same energy and hope that she has lived every other day of her life. Chemo would have killed that long before now

    Answer by sillyt at 3:28 PM on Oct. 13, 2010

  • My husband had this decision to make a couple months ago when he was found to have stage 4 cancer. He chose chemo and is currently undergoing it. He refused at first but I think he decided if it got him one more year with his family and young sons he'd do it. It was a hard choice, either way would have been difficult.

    However, it was his choice, I gave him my opinion and told him Id support whatever he wanted to do even if he did nothing. My interest was his happiness and if not doing anything made his remaining days happy then that was what Id do. Chemo is a hard road to take, its been very difficult for us but he's remained positive and it was his choice and so I support him 110%.

    So basically...whatever their decision is, whether I agree or not, is what Ill support.

    Answer by Amaranth361 at 4:10 PM on Oct. 13, 2010