Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How to keep Monster in Law away

I'll be having my baby in Feb. and I really don't want my mother in law anywhere near me when its happening. At our wedding she 1) wore white, 2) had her arms crossed was upset through the entire ceremony, 3) she left right afterwards before pictures. When we told her we were pregnant, she was angry and upset and said that she wasnt ready to be a grandma.

She's got this way of really messing up my special days, so how can I keep her away without hurting my husband. We've talked about it, but he says its important for her to be there and if she does or says anything he'll make her leave. I just dont want her to have the opportunity to ruin this. It's way too special.

....Oh and the last time we spoke to her she said hoped that I'd be in labor for 15 hrs so that she'd have time to drive here from where she's coming from.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:19 PM on Oct. 27, 2008 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (14)
  • when your going in, in the middle of the "rush" tell him your going to call her and don't, lmao.
    chagenue

    Answer by chagenue at 2:24 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I have no idea! Mine is just as bad! She told me last week IN FRONT OF MY HUSBANDS ENTIRE FAMILY that i needed to start eating because SHE bought me a pair of jeans in size 0 and they fit! And she refuses to learn sign language for my braindamaged son and told me that my other child, that is not my husbands, needs to be given back to his dad because Anthony doesn't need three kids! When you find something that works let me know. You could just not tell her and explain that you wanted the time to be just for you and your husband. the hosp. staff won't let her in if you say no. it may sound harsh but you're baby's only going to be born once so do it your way.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:28 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I say be the bigger person....call her after you have the baby...lol
    twotwinsmom

    Answer by twotwinsmom at 2:29 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • If she feels she is not ready to be a grandma then why does she want to be there? For your hubby I would let her be there though in the waiting room but one remark and her ass is out!
    Christinemg0813

    Answer by Christinemg0813 at 2:29 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • for me.... there are multiple inlaws and one set and i dont get along and she is demanding to be let in the room during the birth... and it would mean alot to him to have her in there.... secretively keep him busy with holding your hand and getting your things that she wont have time to be there.... and after wards if she does decide to open her mouth... the staff will be escorting her out... thats just how it is.... dont let her ruin your experiance and this wonderful time for you and your family.... my husband is deployed so my plan is to just not call her... and if she gets upset well them dont come too bad... sucks for you... my mom will be in there with me not his!!!!!
    reipea0807

    Answer by reipea0807 at 2:41 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • How far does she have to drive? Wait until your 9cms dialated and then call. hehehe
    MomShawn70

    Answer by MomShawn70 at 3:01 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I had the same issue. My monster in law ruins every special event--- acted very similarly to yours on our wedding day! She did, however, stay for pictures. She looks MAD AT THE WORLD in every one of them! Ugh! Anyway, I simply explained to my husband that I didn't want anyone around except for him, my parents, and my little sister. I gently reminded him of how she ruined our wedding, was an hour late & very rude at my baby shower, etc. and how I just didn't want that day ruined. Like a previous poster said, your baby is only going to be born once--- make it special! We compromised that AFTER the baby was born, or when it was too close to time for her to possibly make it, he could call her. He called her right before he was born, and she acted as if she could care less. She dragged in the next day, stayed for 5 minutes, and left.

    Good luck!
    heather.huckaby

    Answer by heather.huckaby at 3:28 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I agree with the poster that said if she isn't ready to be a grandma, why does she want to be there? It is a special day for you and your husband. When I had my son, it was the doc 2 nurses and my hubby in the room. That's it. No one needs a crowd when you've got your legs spread wide open for all to see. How embarassing. It's a very intimate, personal experience that a crowd doesn't need to see.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:53 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • i would agree, wait until ur labor is very progressed so she wont get there until its over, but also tell ur husband how important this moment is to u and ask him to run interference... i think that a lot of hospitals will listen when u tell them u want everyone except ur husband to wait in the waiting room, so they wont even let her in there to ruin it. i want my mom and my husband in there with me, and my hospital acts like im so weird that i dont want my own mom to wait in the waiting room, so i dont think they will be letting other relatives in if u tell them not to. just be glad ur mother in law lives far away, not right down the street, so she wont be interefering too much with the baby
    Butterflysky_24

    Answer by Butterflysky_24 at 3:53 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • hey- i hate my mother in law 95% of the time- so i definatly feel your pain. she insisted on being in the labour and delivery room while i was havnig my son. however, before hand i had talked to my maternity nurse, and told her i DID NOT want her in there; and that my boyfriend were not allowing anyone in until about an hour later. yah she had to wait longer, yah she bitched- but my boyfriend and i got to have that time with our brand new little bundle!
    Stephanie.Xo

    Answer by Stephanie.Xo at 4:15 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN