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am i a rude hostess?

last night i had my parents and my grandmother over for pizza and cake to celebrate my daughter's birthday. we opened presents first (daughter's choice) and then i went to the kitchen and put a slice of pizza on a plate for everyone. i have 3 kids ages 4 (the birthday girl), 22 months, and 9 months. the 22 month old needs hers cut up, so i did that first before i handed out the plates. i always serve my kids first, and i figured if anyone was starving they could use their own two legs to get their plate. well my mom was right on my ass all night, serving everyone and cleaning up before i even had a chance to. then complaining that she might as well have done it at her house. i didnt ask her to do anything, she did it on her own. i wouldnt expect her to clean up my house. then as we're eating, my mom asks everyone if they want a drink. i was still getting drinks for the kids. is it rude of me to take care of them first?


Asked by tnm786 at 9:18 AM on Oct. 14, 2010 in Just for Fun

Level 43 (159,608 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • I feel you were right. Maybe next time, though, you could say something to the adults, saying you'll be serving them after you get the kids served. What your mom did was a little insulting, but I doubt she meant it that way. She's probably just used to doing it in her own home. Her remark to you should not have been said. Next time if she starts doing things, just nicely say, mom, I want you to sit down and enjoy the party, I'll do the serving.

    Answer by SweetLuci at 9:27 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • I don't think it was rude, I think your mom could have been a bit nicer about 'helping' though and not make it seem like she was so put-upon to do so.

    Answer by MizLee at 9:26 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • didnt really know what category to put this in.

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 9:18 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • Let it go. Thank her for her help.

    Answer by tootoobusy at 9:20 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • No, kids that age can't get their own stuff so you were right to get them set up first.

    Answer by shanlaree at 9:21 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • Everyone knows that if you come here I will serve all kids first. It has been that way everywhere I have ever gone for get togethers. Then I either serve everyone or have them serve themselves. Just depends on the situation.

    Answer by tiddliwinks at 9:22 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • i think your mom was just trying to help you. i would serve the kids first...i wouldve set cups and plates out for everyone else to self serve thought and told them to come and get it or just asked for help.

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:26 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • she was trying to help and i did thank her, but she stressed herself out in a situation that didnt need to be stressful at all. she's always been very "anal" about cleanliness and hosting stuff. i wish she'd realize that in my home she's allowed to sit back and let me do all the work lol

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 9:28 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • I always serve the kids first, and when I have a bunch of people over I do things buffet style. As people walk in I ask if they want a drink and get it, but then when dinner is ready I set it all out and let people get what they want.

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 9:40 AM on Oct. 14, 2010

  • just smile thank her and go on because my mother is this way and has been for years......she loves to help but will complain to make sure everyone knows she is doing the "helping" so just thank her nicely and smile works wonders everytime for me ......happy bday to your little girl.....

    Answer by cara124 at 9:41 AM on Oct. 14, 2010