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2 Bumps

How do you deal with an overdeveloped 13 yo?

My step-daughter developed when she was 11 and now wears a DD. It's hard for me to relate because I'm only a b! I know she has been picked on at school and there have been some incidents with boys. Her mentality has totally NOT caught up with her body. How do we help her and keep her safe??

 
Shanna84

Asked by Shanna84 at 9:38 AM on Oct. 15, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 24 (18,695 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • firstly, take her to get fitted by a professional to make sure she's wearing the absolute correct size, and take her every 6 months or so to get refitted. if her breasts are that heavy at such a young age it is imperative that the band be tight enough and she be supported by a real bra! my mom NEVER did this and i had massive stretch marks and back problems by the time i was 16.

    second, dont make her wear clothes that are baggy and shapeless because they'll just make her look fat and she'll be picked on for it. also don't have her wear high cut tops, theyll actually make her boobs look bigger. go for an inch or two above the start of cleavage for the best look. teach her that fitted layers are the key to looking good while keeping her modesty.

    teach her about relationships. whats healthy in a relationship, whats not. if a man seems obsessed, tell someone. always walk with friends. never give your number to strangers.
    LunaB

    Answer by LunaB at 8:48 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • Coming from personal experience...it was more than awkward having a c cup when I was her age, and then ballooned into a d-dd at 13. I would notice men looking at me inappropriately and it made me feel very uncomfortable and want to hide my body from their gaze. It helped that my mother acknowledged this (and the behavior exhibited towards me - even in front of her in the grocery store!) and how this might affect me. I would say promoting confidence for herself no matter what will help her through the transition into young adulthood, especially because self-esteem issues can really surface - for any adolescent for that matter. Her development is not something for her to feel shameful about and it's not her fault there are perverted older men (or peers) who will be inappropriate. Sports, self-defense, leadership courses - all help. And an open communication line with you and your husband so she process it all. :) good luck
    supersammyz

    Answer by supersammyz at 10:44 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • I agree with the mom above me, but I also wanted to add that some creative outlet would be helpful. Something like writing, art, theater, singing, something that allows her to express herself. And on a side note that is sort of related, make sure she is wearing bras that fit properly. I know from experience that it will make a difference.
    xv35ballx

    Answer by xv35ballx at 7:49 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • When I was 13 I was also a DD (now I'm a DDD) and I don't know what you can do for her except try to help her out and explain why boys are acting that way and why the girls are too....I was big enough to take care of myself, all the way until HS I was the tallest and everything, it was strange for me....but shortly thereafter everyone got taller than me, lol...either way just tell her to let it roll off her back if you can....
    KnitWit0686

    Answer by KnitWit0686 at 6:59 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • also, don't call attention to her boobs with jokes and little funny comments. its devastating to a girl's self esteem to be constantly reminded of how different she is. a lot of people think that by cutting her down every once in a while i.e: "not letting her get too full of herself" they will be keeping her safe and chaste. wrong. she'll just look for acceptance and love elsewhere, and that generally turns out bad.
    i suggest going to www.bravissimo.com after she's been professionally fitted and ordering a free catalog, they have some very pretty things and made me feel more normal!
    LunaB

    Answer by LunaB at 8:55 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • Find a minimizer bra. I had the same problem. I had double d's when I was 11!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:20 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • Holy crap. Size DD at 11?
    mybabybugssmile

    Answer by mybabybugssmile at 11:55 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • Holy crap. Size DD at 11?



    Yup. It was so embarrassing. I don't know where the big boobs came from-my mom was an A cup!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:30 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • the pp has giving you a lot of great advice i was a 44dd in 7th grade and it always seemed that boys were looking at my boobs and not my face I had old pervy men coming on to me also, I was raped at the age of 17 so self defense class's are a good idea also tell her she is beautiful and that u love her
    Bellsbabyboys

    Answer by Bellsbabyboys at 8:42 AM on Oct. 17, 2010

  • another thing to add, sewing is a wonderful skill for girls in general, but even more so for girls that are heavily endowed. see if that's a hobby she'd like to take up! off the rack clothing is sized for a b cup, and she'll be spending her entire life trying hard not to look frumpy or slutty in the same clothes the other girls wear. sewing will give her some freedom of expression and let her have exactly the type of wardrobe she likes, either by taking in larger clothes, adding fabric to smaller clothes, or doing full bust adjustments to patterns to create something from scratch!
    13 is such a hard age anyway, keep her close to you and dh!
    LunaB

    Answer by LunaB at 11:06 AM on Oct. 17, 2010

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