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3 Bumps

My husband is so selfish in the bedroom

I gave him the kama sutra awhile ago, he hasn't even opened the first page.. bought lube & cuffs for the room to make things exciting, he wasn't into that.. whenever we have sex, he's in it for just himself, he gets off as fast as he can, no foreplay, nothing.. it really is the worst sex of my life. i don't know what to do, i'm beyond sexually frustrated that masturbation doesn't even help anymore. any advice or suggestions are appreciated.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:07 AM on Oct. 15, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • oh boy. that sucks. you didnt know that before you married him? lol.
    i would not be having sex with him at all then. why do you even let him get off? you need to tell him no more nothing until he starts to care about your desires too.

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 10:15 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • I think its time you cuff HIM and go to town on him!

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:13 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • yea honestly if hes gonna be that selfish then dont have sex with him until he gets the point. or cuff him and get him going and then stop. do that for a few nights till he gets frustrated then look at him and be all like yea now you know how i feel.

    Answer by ear92 at 10:27 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • Honestly, that's why I think people should have sex before marriage. You don't know if you are compatible or not, otherwise.

    Answer by wenona_mandy at 11:13 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • How about you get on top. That way you're in controll. When you see he's getting close, slow down completely. Also, it's obvious your DH feels he doesn't have to work for it anymore (Men!), very much like mine, so I'd suggest you stimulate yourself beforehand and perhaps during to match his brief performance. I know it sucks but that's marriage for ya

    Answer by CassyzMom at 10:32 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • wait until he's in bed naked and just jump this bones. it might be fun. if he can get off and leave you unfullfilled do the same to him.

    Answer by canta1980 at 10:36 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • Sit down and talk this over. Read the kama sutra together. Schedule a weekly personal time for the two of you............actually put it on the calendar.............and then start with talking, reading, reminding each other what got you together in the first place. it's worth a little work if it gets things back on track.

    Answer by elizabr at 10:37 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • i dont know how old he is, but it may have a bit to do with his age...obviously there are always exceptions, but somewhere in the mid to late 20's there's a drop in men's sex drive (and an increase in womens). maybe he enjoys the release of having an orgasm but isnt so interested in the sex itself. or maybe you two just arent sexually compatable anymore....i'm actually a big advocate of women having a friends with benefits type arrangement with another woman because it helps to fill that void and some men dont view it as cheating.

    Answer by LoriaAnn at 11:29 AM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • Are you married to my ex?! Seriously, some guys just don't have the mindset to consider their partner's enjoyment, emotions, experience. Think you need to tell him that you need more from him.

    Answer by rio_burb at 12:00 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • I am not sure I have never had this issue but I agree with first poster

    Answer by LiLJeni at 3:01 AM on Oct. 16, 2010