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Is this wrong of me?

A few months ago a high school acquaintance found me on FB. We started chatting just about live in general, about our kids...he has a GF too, and I found out he is a personal trainer. I really want to get back into shape, I have 3 kids and had them pretty closely together and while I am back to my pre-pregnancy size I still want to tone up some certain areas. So I asked this friend to become my personal trainer. My husband doesnt like the idea of me having male friends and I know he will freak if he finds out that I hired this friend as a personal trainer especially. Its just that I finally have somebody to help me reach my workout goals and it feels good to have a companion to workout with. My sister tells me this is wrong of me to hide it from my husband, but he has done his fair share of dirt to me. I just want to do something for myself but dont want to get bashed for it.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:49 PM on Oct. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • The question is "Is it worth a disagreement and can you stand your ground?" You should not have to hide anything. Everything should be out in the open it prevents hurt and anger afterwards.

    Answer by truly.a.taurus at 5:52 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • I think that you should find another personal trainer. This can blow up in your face big time if your hubby finds out from someone elese.

    Answer by A.Perry at 5:54 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • If it will cause a huge problem, would it be easier to just find another trainer???

    Answer by skittles1108 at 5:56 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • If you are not willing to tell your husband, then find another trainer. This could be very ugly down the road if he finds out you are hidng this from him. Just because he has done things to you in the past is not a reason to rationalize why this is okay. That smacks of revenge and that rarely works out the way you think it will.

    Answer by CorrinaWithrow at 6:00 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • I see nothing wrong with having this guy train you, but if you do it without husband knowing it's just going to make you look bad for keeping it from him.
    not right, but that's the way it works.


    Answer by ItsMe89 at 6:03 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • The way I look at it is, if you have to hide something from your spouse, you shouldn't be doing it at all.

    Answer by prdmama1154 at 6:19 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • I hope your husband hires a female personal trainer behind your back so you can see just how crappy a move it is.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 6:27 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • You need to be honest about this IMO.

    Answer by lowencope at 6:30 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • What would happen if he found out on his own and got the wrong impression? No matter how well you intended nothing by it, either a friend or him seeing for himself, it could blow the whole thing out of proportion. Once you find a routine right for you, maybe you should go to another gym to keep from anything happening.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:05 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • If you knew what you were doing was all right, you wouldn't be here asking for input. It sounds like you and your hubby have some problems, and this will only make things worse if it comes out. My advice? Keep exercising--everyone needs to feel good about themselves--but find a way to do it without this male friend trainer.

    Answer by SpcZil at 7:25 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

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