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2 Bumps

In desperate need of advice for a 5 yr old

I watch my room mates two children in the evening b/c she works 2nd shift so I am the main care giver.The 5 year old just started school this year and she is having really BAD behavioral issues in school,she gets negative notes sent home every day,and the only day she has a good day was there 1/2 a day Wednesday.I have tried not letting her go outside,not letting her watch cartoons, I am beyond myself and I am not sure what else to do.Her mother is not being much help,any advice is welcome,thank you

Answer Question

Asked by alaina_20 at 6:15 PM on Oct. 15, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 7 (151 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I would set an appt with the school counselor

    Answer by MamaSpurg at 6:16 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • more details: what are the behavior problems that you're experiencing? What about at school? Any big change in her life aside of starting school.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 6:17 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • sounds like a meet & great with the teacher is in order. either you or the momma needs to get that scheduled asap

    Answer by hibbingmom at 6:17 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • The answer is in the question. "Her Mother is not being much help" Sounds like this kid rarely interacts with her Mom...thjat in itself can be the trigger for behavioral acting out. Punishment rarely works with 5 yr olds. Try a sticker chart. Everyday she gets no bad note she gets a sticker..When she earns 5 stickers she gets a reward... my grankids love to earn rewards of an ice cream at McD's..or a small fries...things I don't generally get tham. A small toy from the dollar store. Whatever works for you.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 6:21 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • There is soooooo much to say to this, ideas, suggestions, etc...
    Sounds like getting a few good parenting books, meeting with teachers, perhaps even a different style of educational philosophy.
    Have a very consistent rhythm everyday and childcare providers keep this going. A media-free home can help, too. Is she having food sensitivities? Recent immunizations? Anxiety with starting school?

    What do the notes say about school behavior?

    Answer by doulala at 6:35 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • The issues are being disruptive,not staying in her seat,not listening, and they have even moved her to another class room just to get her to do her work.

    Comment by alaina_20 (original poster) at 7:15 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • Has she been tested for any behavior issues? Ask the school to have an evaluation done.

    Answer by elizabr at 7:28 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • She might need a little positive attention instead of punishments. Praise her for doing things right and spend some quality time with her. The mom should really be doing this too.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:30 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • I would reiterate the importance of following the rules.
    If she can not then she can move from her "work" (her seat), and go help the teacher with chores around the room~ alternative work. It might need to happen two or three times so she can get out of this rut.

    What is her work? Is this *really* appropriate for her age? And for *her*? Every child is different~

    Is she *really* not listening? How does the teacher know? Because she chooses not to follow directions? How old is she~ five. What do five-year-old's do? Act five. The expectations might be too much (overall or just for her temperament).


    Answer by doulala at 7:41 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

  • cont.

    The expectations need to be clear prior to her starting. She can be reminded. If that's not working then an alternative route is essential.
    There is nothing wrong with a 5-year-old needing to be kinetic, etc... Keep this in mind and consider another method of education if this isn't the best fit.

    Her mom needs to see what is really going on and IF this route is really the right thing for her child.
    There may be nothing "wrong" with her child at all.


    Answer by doulala at 7:42 PM on Oct. 15, 2010

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