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What should I do? My husband and I are drifting apart!

My husband and I have been together for eight years, we have been happy the majority of the time. We have always had our own things going and it seems like our lives merge at night and on Sundays. I have been sick and my husband and I haven't been having sex often. I found that he had been looking at porn (kind of in place of me). He apologized and said he wouldn't do it again (he has had a problem with porn in the past and it lasted for about 1 1/2 years before I found out). I am still hurt by it and now I find myself distant from him. What do I do? He isn't trying to mend our relationship either. I feel really let down, this is the second time it's happened, he knows where I stand in the issue and I don't think that porn should take the place of intimacy in a relationship.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:19 PM on Oct. 27, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • The best advice: Couples Counseling. He may also need to see a therapist about his porn addiction. If he won't go to counseling, go by yourself. The real question is: Do you want to save your marriage? If so, counseling is required at this point.

    Answer by WD40 at 11:34 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I agree with PP; go to counseling (couples would be best/but sinlges is better than nothing).

    Answer by gwood at 11:35 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • I am sorry this is happening to you. Have you tried to go out the box? I know when the husband go for porn and left us in the corn put anybody down. But is best that he is with porno then with other real person. I suggest you chance the way you treat him on the bed. Try find others exciting places in the house or somewhere else. Try to find out what is his biggest fantasies and let him know yours, And go for it! Realize them and keep looking for more! This will keep him wanting to be with you, and he wouldn't care about porn anymore, make him feel as he is the porno star. If doesn't work go to counseling.


    Answer by Zenn at 11:53 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • see i work at pircillas- adult novelty shop and about 70% of my customers are couples and the older ones will tell you any day of the week when the sex is gone the relationship is gone having said that you guys should explore both sides of ur fantazies or fetishes and find a kinky raunchy medium and a lovey dovey beautiful sex cause you guys will find what turns eachother on and even find some new ways to do it as well.

    Answer by jaces_mom at 1:01 AM on Oct. 28, 2008