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3 Bumps

what should i do?

well the relationship with my husband is i don't even have word for it but what i can say is that he cheated me a few times before and he yells at me all the time because i haven't cleaned the home for a few hours ( i clean the home twice a day) or criticise the way i raise our son i know he doesn't love me but i thought he at least cared about us so i asked him if he maybe wanna work on it like spend some time alone so we can talk or just have some fun like we used too and he starts getting angry again and saying "what is that gonna change? is that gonna bring money to eat?" i just don't understand... sometimes i just wanna leave him but i got nothing and nobody ... he says that i don't work i don't anything at home... but i really wanna work but at first i can't find a job cause i didn't study ( believe me i tried) and if i would fnd a job i would have to use all the money to pay for my son's daycare...

 
krystina888

Asked by krystina888 at 11:22 AM on Oct. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (63 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • There are agencies that help moms in your situation. They can offer job training, day care (free or low cost), housing asst., Wic, food stamps, etc. Then there's always child support. You & your child need to get away from this toxic man before things get even worse. You can do it. You have to do it to protect you & your child. It wont be easy, but you will be stronger & happier once you break free & start a new life w/out him & his emotional abuse & negativity. Good luck to you & your child.
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 11:36 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • Do not let him make you think you can't do it without him. That there is know where for you to go. Believe me I have been in your place before. Get out of the relationship. You will have to do it alone. But you will be happy alone them with him.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 11:37 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • i would be leaving dnt let not having anybody stop you!!! you have to do what makes you happy....... there is apparently someone out there who is better for you and will treat you better!!! dnt let 1 person put ur life on hold!!!!
    Alyson_Torres09

    Answer by Alyson_Torres09 at 11:27 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • He might just be stressed at work. The economy is crap everywhere and he might be worried about losing his job. On the other hand, that doesn't give him the right to take it out on you.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 11:45 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • there is always someone out there to lend out a hand... and you may not be bringing in any money but you are doing your part you take care of the family... don't let a man ever make you think your not good enough cause in the long run he really wouldn't know what to do without you... women are and will always be stronger then men.
    Lynnsae

    Answer by Lynnsae at 11:45 AM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • It doesn't sound like he wants to work on your marriage, if he is willing to get counseling with you, I'd try that because you have a child, but, if this man has cheated on you several times, and is this demeaning to you, you need to find a way to leave. I was very young when I left my ex husband. I was a single mom of a 2 year old, and had no real work history. It was very scary at first, but I found out I was happier taking care of my baby & myself without him. You can do this...the and as one of the other moms said, there is probably help out there. He will have to pay your child support & possibly alimony. See a lawyer (he will probably have to pay YOUR lawyer fees as well) don't leave him without a lawyer.

    Please don't wait until you are in your 40's & have missed out on half of your life....& don't let your child grow up thinking this is okay

    If you need a "virtual" mom, please message me. Your post really touched me
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 12:17 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • you need to get out of there. What is the point in staying in a relationship if he refuses to work things out. It takes two to make a marriage work and so fr you in the battle by yourself. Leave him go stay with a friend or family member for a week and see if that puts his head on straight. If not then leave him, your better off with out him.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 12:36 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • I agree with OhWrite. You are way too young to have someone abuse you like that !! Sounds like HE is telling you that you can't get a job because you didn't study - you didn't need to have studied to work as a waitress or work at McDonald's. The economy is crap and jobs are hard to come by for anyone right now, but there is help out there and you need to look for it and take it - get away from this jerk !! Don't think for a second that it will get better when the economy gets better, or he's just stressed at work so that's why he is treating you this way - there is no excuse for abuse (verbal and emotional abuse can be just as bad as physical abuse). I know !!!
    JustMyOpinion22

    Answer by JustMyOpinion22 at 7:28 AM on Oct. 17, 2010

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