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So confused and feeling so bad about myself please please help me!!

I have recently realized that I am bi-curious and I have been strongly attracted to a women I met about 1 month ago. I have really realized how attracted to women I am and I don't know how to handle it.Especially when I am so attracted to one particular women that probably isnt bi-sexual. I almost feel bad for haveing these feelings for her. I am married and have and always will be 100% faithful I don't feel bad for haveing these feelings because I am married because I know if my hubby knew this he would be thrilled. I guess I feel bad becaue I feel like I am wrong for feeling this way about a women that has no idea and is probably not bi. Am I wrong for this and what can I do to stop these feelings. Getting her out of my life is not an option right now.Any advise would be wounderful.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:45 PM on Oct. 27, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • i agree about the society and the way we are brought up to believe it's wrong but that's not right either.. you are perfectly fine to feel this way and you will be ok.. you don't need to go reading the bible and throw yourself into a hypocritical religion.. it's not going to make the feelings go away.. communicate with your husband, have self control and know your boundries and things will be just fine..

    Answer by Keri77 at 1:58 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Well, getting into the Bible and spending time in prayer is the best way to ward off sinful desires. Good for you for realizing that it's something that should stop.

    Answer by Maddape48854 at 11:49 PM on Oct. 27, 2008

  • There is nothing wrong with being bi-sexual. There is something wrong with cheating on your husband so you might want to put some space between yourself and her so you don't do anything stupid. But then this is just my opinion and I'm going to have a lot of religious moms saying that homosexuality is a sin and blah, blah, blah.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Thank you to the response above this one. I really needed to hear that. Especially since the first one really botherd me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Have you ever wondered why you are feeling bad? If it is really "OK" then why would you feel bad? Maybe reading what the Bible has to say about homosexuality isn't such a bad idea. The bad feelings you are having could be a thing called conviction. There are only two forces in this world, good and evil, and if something is making you feel bad about yourself and confused, what source do you think it is coming from? Look at it this way, if it really is ok, then what harm can be done by reading the Bible and trying to pray? If you are not willing to even entertain that thought, then maybe it is because, deep down, you know it is wrong.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:26 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I think I am feeling bad because society says it is wrong. I do belive in God and I don't think this is anything I am going to burn in hell for or anything I need to ask forgivness for. I believe God loves me for me and not my sexual orientation.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • You are right, you will not burn in hell for this sin anymore than any other sin. We go to hell for not accepting Jesus as our Lord and acknowledging the gift He gave us by dying on the cross for our sins. And you are also right that God loves you no matter what. However, He does expect us to read His word and do our best to abide by it. If we don't do that, we are only hurting ourselves because our disobedience keeps Him from blessing us as richly as He wants to. If you truely believe in God, don't you think it'd be a good idea to see what he has to say on this subject?

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • well i think the best way to go about it is talk to ur hubby and find out his place on everything and after u guys have figured that out u should explore because ask anyone in a marriage that works out well and they will tell you that sex is a key part of the happiness and if ur not happy or wanting to explore then just talk about it and see what will make u happy. Cause if you ignore this and it turns into depression or something worse you will have wished u did something about it.

    Answer by jaces_mom at 12:53 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • What you feel is not are entitles to your feelings. If you would never act on them because you are married and plan on remaining faithful then they are harmless feelings. He doesn't know, she doesn't know so no big deal.
    That is like beating yourself up for having a dream that you cheated...did you really cheat? No. So let it go.

    Answer by salexander at 10:20 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • well i feel that way sometimes too and i feel bad. but i think it mite just be a phase maybe u need to get that women lesbian urge out of u. i hate 2 admit it. but i used 2 watch women porn flicks and then i got sick of seeing women touchihng each other and i went back to my normal self. u just have a curiosity in you. maybe u and ur hubby can watch some of those together or u could untill that urge goes away... now i dont have those feeling anymore and i felt guilty like i was cheating. but im over it. and ur hubby mite actually think thats sexy.. depends on if u feel comfortable talkng to him about that.... as for the women u like. theres nothing worng with thinkn a women is attractive. just dont do anything with her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:34 AM on Oct. 28, 2008