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Advice anyone? Helpful advice, please

DH is military and this morning something happened at work that he could be in a lot of trouble for, to the point of being kicked out of the military possibly. Nobody in his chain of command is working today so we won't know til tomorrow. However, the stress of this combined with the stress of other things going on and he's already got some mild depression is really causing him to have a bad day. i sent him out with friends to go paintballing to get him out of the house and give him a break and some fun, but what else can i do to help him? i know tomorrow will suck because he's going to be in a lot of trouble one way or another, whether its loss of rank, discharge, etc so I want him to have one more "good" day before this really hits. suggestions? advice? and does anyone know how hard it is to get a GOOD job if he gets discharged?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:39 PM on Oct. 16, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • just let him know u are behind him 100% and u guys will get through it together and just spend time with him and do fun things together
    Tinkerbell80

    Answer by Tinkerbell80 at 6:45 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • I know it's hard but if he knew ahead of time that this thing would get him in serious trouble, then he shouldn't have done it. My husband and I have both served in the military and learned early on (boot camp) not to do things that could keep you from getting a good job when you're done. I wish I had something positive to say, but he should have known better than to do something that would get him trouble, getting an NJP, and then getting kicked out for doing something stupid.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 2:56 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • No its not something that he knew ahead of time, somebody left a door unlocked that should not have been unlocked, and it was discovered when the cops did their daily check, and he's not sure if it was him or his supervisor that left the door unlocked but his supervisor is the kind of guy that even if it was him he's not going to tell them the truth. He's not stupid, he doesn't do things that he knows are wrong. He's normally really aware of things like that. They had a squadron bbq yesterday and he had a lot of responsibilities yesterday and could have left it unlocked accidentally, but he would never have done it on purpose. It was a mistake. A stupid mistake but still its not like he has ever done it before but because of the seriousness of this particular door that was left unlocked and open (which leads us to believe it was his supervisor after he had been drinking at the bbq), there will be consequences.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:05 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • Hope all goes well n its not too hard of a punishment
    lovelypisces

    Answer by lovelypisces at 3:41 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • Oh and he has been in for over 12 years, its not like he's new to the job. It was a mistake on the part of whoever did it, not a conscious thing, and it was after the squadron had provided them alcohol at their bbq. I know its no excuse for making a mistake of these proportions, but maybe that makes a difference. I don't know. I guess we will be finding out tomorrow. I just don't know how we will make it on the outside if he gets kicked out, or how we will make it if he loses rank either.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:08 PM on Oct. 16, 2010

  • I know absolutely nothing about the military, but I can't believe he'd get kicked out for something like that. Really? Even if it was dangerous goods or something extremely important that was supposed to be locked. Your husband has signed up to put his life on the line! People 'accidentally' kill people and get off easier in the war. Sorry if I'm way off the mark here, again, I know nothing about military, but I think your husband should hold his head high knowing he signed up for something very few of us could say we would. People make mistakes in all jobs, his just has bigger consequences. Good luck!
    Gandeluv

    Answer by Gandeluv at 12:16 AM on Oct. 17, 2010

  • From what I understand of the military, something like what you are describing is not going to get him kicked out or even lose rank. He might get written up, but that's about it - people are too hard to find who want to be in the military these days !!! Relax - he'll be fine - I'd be really surprised if anything happens that is worse than how he is reacting.
    JustMyOpinion22

    Answer by JustMyOpinion22 at 6:28 AM on Oct. 17, 2010

  • Well so far the minimum he is getting is a LOC or LOR, and if it goes to the base commander he can lose rank if the commander pushes the issue. Know more tomorrow
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:19 PM on Oct. 17, 2010

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