Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Do you think this is a fair reason????

I'v seen alot of posts on here latley that women are upset cause their men dont want to have sex with them anymore, and just arent interested....I have also seen alot of answers from different women asking "Have you let yourself go?? Have you gained weight??" Anyway I was just wondering what you all thought do you think this is a good reason for men not to want to have sex with you anymore?? I know I have gained weight with all my kids but I can still look good!! Anyway just wanted to know what you other ladies think!!!

Answer Question
 
scaredmommy08

Asked by scaredmommy08 at 8:11 AM on Oct. 28, 2008 in Relationships

Level 3 (16 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Well...when my husband and I started dating I was a size 12, which is pretty small for my height and bone structure. Since then I have become morbidly obese. Yes, this has made an impact in our sex life, and I don't blame him one bit. I would feel the same way if he put on more than a hundred pounds. While I would still love him and feel attracted to the person inside, I would miss the sexy man I married. No, I don't think changes in appearance are a good reason for no sex altogether, but we wouldn't find our man that attractive if he sat around in his sweatpants all day, fifty pounds overweight, et.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:20 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • well for me he can take it or leave it I am not going to go ouy of my way to you happy when i am not. it is not like he can not be replaced!!!
    madcat500

    Answer by madcat500 at 9:18 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Well, it shouldn't be a reason to disrespect your wife (or husband) but depending on the degree of the weight gain it could have an impact on actual attraction. I have found that I was less into the idea of sex when I was feeling bad about MYSELF and that itself can sort of ruin the whole sexual interaction for both parties!
    BJoan

    Answer by BJoan at 9:45 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Hey men gain weight...are they less attractive to us...Usually not..
    I believe that when they love you, they love you no matter what.
    Now if you triple you weight or something...I can maybe see why they would be less attractive to you.
    Dannee

    Answer by Dannee at 9:46 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I don't give a rats rear if you tripple your weight...for better or for worse! You can be a large woman and not be a slob. Now if you lay on the couch eating Dorito's all day and never get dressed or brush your teeth...well then I think anyone would complain at that point. I say as long as you make an effort to clean yourself up and wear something besides pj's or sweats every single day then at least you still care about your apperance to some extent. There are plenty of skinny women who married skinny men who now after 10 yrs of marriage have a beer belly and leave off shaving every once in awhile....just look around you in the stores...men who have let themselves go are out there too! Women tend to be less shallow then men so I think for them it is a bigger issue.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 9:51 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • less shallow thAn men...sorry
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 9:52 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • i think a lot of men marry women with out the thought that they might get "bigger: with time. And when it happens they lose interest. i think its wrong but it happens. a lot of men think its ok for them to gain weight and the woman should still have sex but they have the right to have sex with other woman if their wife gets bigger. i dont get it!!!!..
    chrstny88

    Answer by chrstny88 at 10:05 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I SAY THIS IS ME RIGHT NOW AND I EXCEPT ME AS I AM TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT!
    tootsieyeatts

    Answer by tootsieyeatts at 10:19 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • "letting yourself go" doesn't mean gaining weight. It means not showering, not trying to look even decent. A man's not going to want to touch you when you smell and I think that's fair. I wouldn't want to touch a man who smelled...ick
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I can understand how it may affect a relationship, but I would be more concerned about the health aspect of it in the sense that obesity (if it applies) is a serious health concern for anyone and weight gain can also be one.
    LovingParent08

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 10:34 AM on Oct. 28, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.