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How do you replace breastfeeding for a bonding time?I stopped now, my daughter is almost 14 months now.??

I feel bad, so breastfeeding was always a bonding time for me and my daughter. And now that I am pregnant again I gotmy daughter off breastfeeding now that she is 14 months which isn't a bad age. And now she screams in the middle of the night, she wants picked up 3 times a night and wakesme up half of the night. She lays all over me, grabs on to me. Righjt when I get home from work she wants my attention 24/7 which I give to her it's just she needs, more, more, more. I give her a sippy cup and read top her now for our bond time and play more with her in her room with the toys. I also rub her head and give her kisses and hugs, so am I on the right path?

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Asked by Anonymous at 7:40 PM on Oct. 17, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (5)
  • It kind of sounds like too much attention to me. It's time you get a little tough with her. Tell her you now have a new bonding time. She might fuss and cry a few nights, but you have to let her cry it out. You have to nip it in the bud before that new baby gets here.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:44 PM on Oct. 17, 2010

  • Yes, you are on the right path. We had snuggle time every nite before bed. Just holding them close to you in a calm relaxing environment can do the trick. Some kids need more contact or reassurance than others. Hopefully involving her w/ the new baby (age approriately of course), will lessen the amt. of jealousy she could feel. (Esp when she sees you nursing the baby) Good luck. :)

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 7:46 PM on Oct. 17, 2010

  • The more you play into her "Bonding Need" the more she will demand from you. You need to break her of the cycle of 'requiring' you in the middle of the night and soo much during the day. I would suggest starting to ween her from her clingy behavior before it gets worse. I would suggest spending a good hour with her before bedtime. Cuddling, reading books, watching movies, whatever gets you two to spend time together. Then during the day allowing her to choose activities that she can play by herself. Let her know that you'll give her love and attention, but she doesn't need it all the time. Just give her the attention that you feel is the right amount and help her understand she doesn't need more. It's only a habit that she has created that she's trying to keep. It can be a very bad habit though.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 9:13 PM on Oct. 17, 2010

  • I stopped nursing around the same time with my son. I had daddy help out with the night feeding for about a week. He woke to nurse but didnt really eat, but just suckled. My favorite bonding time was in the morning. I always did my morning feed in my bed, he ate, we snuggled and usually fell back to sleep. Once I stopped nursing it became a play time. Peek-a-boo with blankets, sometimes shaddow puppets (very dark room lol) I missed the nap more than nursing!

    Answer by 1andcounting at 12:34 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • when my son wants held in the middle of the night, I just pull him into bed with me. I just tell him if he doesnt lay down nice and go nitnit, he goes back in his bed. No crawling on me. No wiggling. No playing. But then I never had a problem with my son sleeping with me. He's usually the one who decides he wants back in his own bed. Just keep up with the attention during the day. It will die down for a bit. Right now she feels things are changing but she doesnt know whats going on so she is clinging to you to feel comfort. Just dont blame the changes, like stoppinjg breastfeeding, on the new baby. (Ex Mommy cant feed you anymore because the new baby needs to eat off mommy) or else it will create jealousy. Find other reasons for things. I tell my son (hes almost 3) that hes too big of a boy for mommy to pick up now. hes a big boy and big boys walk by themselves (i'm pregnant and really cant carry him around anymore)

    Answer by Kayere at 9:13 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

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