Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

I don't know about my Mothers advice.....I have a 12 month old who is very clingy,cries alot,fine when he's with someone else minute I walk in he's crying pulling on me etc.. My mother tells me to not always pick him up or he'll become a spolied brat, but how do Ijust ignore him & think I don't care? What should I do? The fussiness does really stress me out because it's non stop crying when I'm around

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:38 AM on Oct. 18, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (8)
  • well, i kinda agree with your mom..however i too have issues with running to them right when they cry...so i have no room to talk..lol
    mywonderyears

    Answer by mywonderyears at 12:40 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Well, I have no problem holding my kids for a while when i can because I love to be affectionate with them, but I think a routine is nice. FOr example, after breakfast, sit on the couch and read together then set the timer for maybe 15 minutes and say ok now that we're done having reading time, I am gonna clean in the kitchen until the timer rings and then we can meet to play with the doll house or do a puzzle or something. The child can follow you into the kitchen but it would also be good if they could hang out in a nother room listening for the timer...
    txdaniella

    Answer by txdaniella at 12:41 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • at 1yr old he is getting his teeth or he just does not like your mother if a child crys we pick the child up right to make it stop crying and if your mother calls it spoiling then so be your mother of that child not her so give him lots of huggs and kiss oh yey mom pick up your child when he is crying he needs to feel safe
    dutchcanadain

    Answer by dutchcanadain at 12:46 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • I don't think you can spoil a baby. Your child just needs some extra loving. Get a sling or a front carrier. Don't make him feel bad because he clings to you. He trusts you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • I don't think a 1yo needs to be picked up every time he fusses.  If you don't want to hold him you just firmly tell him, "not right noe," and carry on with what you are doing.  I have a bad back and my kids had to learn early on that I couldn't be picking them up or carrying them around, especially my older son who was like 26lbs at 1 and I was 9 months pregnant with his sister.


    I think it's also good for kids to learn that Mommys have things to do and that the world does NOT revolve around them.  If I was busy cooking dinner and one of my kids was demanding to be held they had to wait until I was done.  Usually by then they forgot all about it.

    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 2:22 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Sorry, but I TOTALLY DISAGREE with your mother. You cannot spoil a child that young. He is still a baby! As for the PP who said to teach him the world doesn't revolve around him - THE WORLD DOES REVOLVE AROUND HIM!! And it should! Obviously it's not or he wouldn't be acting this way. OP, I am a little disturbed that he is okay with everyone else, but not with you. That right there tells you that he NEEDS you! NOW! Dinner can wait 20 minutes, or hubby can fix it. Take the time your baby needs you right now because if you don't and if you put him on ignore, he will learn that his needs don't matter to you.
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 6:24 AM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • In this case Mom does NOT know best. Do what your GUT tells you to do, dear. It's correct.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 4:44 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • My daughter has been nursed, so when I first get to her she wants me to hold her and nurse her. Have you nursed your son in the past or recently quit. Nursed babies need that bonding time w/ mommy especially if you've recently quit. When I leave my daughter she cries for like 30 seconds, I don't know if that really even counts as crying. She is upset for a brief moment when I leave, then she's ready to play.
    Olive2smile

    Answer by Olive2smile at 4:48 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN