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How do you get past the past?

The past 3 yrs have been hell. My hubs and I have been married for 2- and our relationship has been filled w his lies, porn addiction, drinking, and now an emotional relationship. Of course, I've flipped out and now have been called a psycho bitch- to our friends- & we're in counseling. He says he regrets everything, & that we can get past all this, but I dunno how. He says I'm his "June Carter Cash"- but I don't know if its more talk or not, or what it means. How do I recover? Or is it time to throw in the towel?

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Asked by kikitty at 1:11 PM on Oct. 28, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (8)
  • sounds like its time to quit if the counseling doesn't work. then you can say you did everything to help save the marriage.

    Answer by hotmama541 at 1:31 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • If you are his June Carter you really want to take care of Johnny

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:40 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I personally don't want to be anyone's June Cash. As romantic as that is, I've been there and I'm telling you, never again! It's a tough decision you have to make. I was married to an addict for 10 yrs. The constant worry, the money, the lies, the fighting, him in and out of jail, losing jobs...that is not living. I've been divorced for 3 yrs and It was a long emotional process to de-program from all that drama. I am so happy now. I never want to go back there again. My advice is don't wait as long as I did.

    Answer by hopelessnance at 1:41 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • sounds like your husband is very immature and expects you to put up with a whole lot of crap. the problem is you have. my husband and i recently went through some major problems, and it took me clearly stating what was acceptable and not acceptable and not falling into that trap of letting him dominate the relationship with his problems. i became willing to show myself the respect i wanted from him and willing to end the marriage over unacceptable behavior. he transformed. you need to make a choice... if you want to save the marriage you are both going to have to let go off all the crap and just make sure you are treating each other and the relationship well in the present. you can keep fighting over it or move on...

    Answer by figaro8895 at 1:49 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Sounds like my marriage! I haven't gotten over it but i focus on myself and my needs. He knows i don't need him in any way and i have no problem leaving with the kids and making it to where he will never see them again.

    Answer by chyna_doll at 1:59 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Been there...done that...GET OUT!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:01 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • move on

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:35 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I would throw in the towel. Men like that do not change, they never grow up, and they will never realize they are wrong. Good luck!!

    Answer by crystac at 2:48 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

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