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i'm normally not this way.

we normally let our son decide what is best for him. his naps. when he's hungry. thirsty. etc. very much child led parenting. but i have had enough today of his hitting so i decided when he was taking his nap. and it's been a long time since he's CIO. he's throwing an outrageous fit in the other room.

am i being a bad mom? i really was just tired of getting him in the face because i wasn't allowing bad behaviour this morning.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:28 PM on Oct. 18, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Some people believe children know whats good for them, and sometimes its true, but others its not. How old is your child? Id say that if he is becoming aggressive, he is either tired, bored, or frustrated. If he does not go to sleep and its not his normal nap time, let him out, but reinforce with small timeouts when hitting!

    Answer by icn_mom at 7:48 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Why would you even begin to allow such behavior? That's just rediculous. You should be more of a proactive parent and issue discipline on a regular basis. The only bad parenting I see is allowing your child to rule your home and hit you, etc.

    Answer by Memigen at 3:32 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • u shouldnt allow the behaviour at all. good for u for not letting him get away with it.

    Answer by Phippsandrea at 3:30 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • So you let your decide everything? LOL! LOL! One day you will regret doing that. You just let him be bad and just deal with it?
    How is he ever going to learn how to be good and do as he is told if you do not teach him? I feel for you when he starts school and he actually has to listen to the teacher, and sit down. Teachers expect kids to go by rules. good luck on that method of raising your child.

    Answer by louise2 at 3:36 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Let him have a fit, you're the parent, you're the boss. You really should have some sort of guidelines for him and not just allow him to do as he pleases because you'll really regret it in the long run. Not trying to be rude or bash but at 1-2, he's in no place to be making decisions.

    Answer by Nanixh at 3:41 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • I agree really have to be consistent...letting him CIO just this once isn't going to change his behavior...he really needs a schedule

    Answer by coolchic320 at 3:36 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • If you want him to be able to make choices here are some instances: What clothes to wear, what plate or cup to use. OR when it's naptime he can read a book quietly in his bed or can give his choices for behavior as well. When you walk in public together he can hold your hand or you can carry him. He can choose what he wants for lunch or maybe talk about rewards he would like for GOOD behavior. These are ALL choices HE is making but within reason. I'm a little confused as to what this parenting is accomplishing? i do believe in choices but there is limit. Pleas don't think I'm bashing but I'm confused. Is there a website I could checkout regarding this method?

    Answer by coolchic320 at 3:48 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • okay to be specific. child led parenting does have discipline. he gets punished when he does something hurtful or harmful. but he leads the flow of his day. it has been proven to make more independent children who do NOT walk all over their parents.

    here's a link.

    and no he doesn't get away with bad behavior. this was more in reference into letting him cry it out. i'm more of an attached parent. we co-sleep and etc.

    Answer by Hollea at 3:53 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • ok...phew..we were worried here...actually my son is a VERY indep toddler and I don't practice this method, but at least we know there is more to it then what was let on..I will read the link..thanks for the info!

    Answer by coolchic320 at 3:59 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • no problem. i just am not one of those parents who hover and worry and am constantly on my child. if he's playing and isn't great at sharing i give him and the other kids he plays with (who's parents parent the same way i do) a chance to work it out on their own before an adult gets involved. it's more of a learning on his own.

    Answer by Hollea at 4:02 PM on Oct. 18, 2010