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who should i choose

i am 27 years old an i love a 25 year old army guy and he loves me but because of his hectic life we decided to just remain friends for now but he asked me to always wait for him and i said i would he said when he is less unstable he will be ready to be with me now i met an older guy who is 48 he works for a federal agency and is wealthy we talk daily and he is always offering to pay any and all bills that i have and one time we had a dinner date an when i got home and emptied my purse i had a large check from him in my purse he says he is at a point in his life where he wants to get married and i am starting to fall for him we have never slept together so my question is this who should i choose the one i already love and said i would wait for or the other one who i am starting to have strong feelings for thank you ladies

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:07 PM on Oct. 28, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • no need to decide just yet what you should do. i would wait and see where your feelings take you for this older man. i wouldn't accept any money from him and make it clear that you are not comfortable getting the money. i would like the idea of having a man with money cause i never had it but sometimes the riches that are worth the most is the true love you get and can give to another man. so you need to get straight whether or not this mans money is influencing you and confusing what you feel might be love. so remove the money and then get to know him better. this other guy might not be the same guy when he gets back or you may change as well. maybe you should just find someone else in between. it's hard keeping a long distance relationship up and keeping the love intact as well.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 5:49 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Would you have these strong feelings had the check not been in the purse?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:11 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • if you love someone else then wait. its wrong to be with another person if you love the other guy. also since then man is well off could you be confusing the feelings cause hes been generous to you? men now how to hook a women and then once your married it changes. id be careful with this one. take your time. i have no issue with age but when money is involved it can confuse things even more. however, if you think the man you love will never "have time" then move on and find someone more stable
    hotmama541

    Answer by hotmama541 at 2:12 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Money isn't everything!! I would definately choose the one I LOVE.
    SchmitzMomOf3

    Answer by SchmitzMomOf3 at 2:12 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • i waited for my marine high school flame. he came back a year later a different man. he wasn't the same. id be careful thou with the older guy. he may just be wanting to be your sugar daddy. take your time with him and if you want to be with him do it for the right reasons. id feel funny about the check.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:19 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • If you choose the 48 year old man for money, you will regret it. You need to look deep inside yourself and see what you like about both men. You could just be lonely and looking to this new man for company. Don't risk your relationship you already have for a "maybe". Try to figure out why you are drawn to the 48 year old. Do you see him as an equal or as an "older" man? If he had no money at all who you like him? Just a few questions to ask yourself. No one can tell you who to choose. Just think about it rationally. Good Luck!
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 2:26 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • It's hard to say go with either one! At this point, don't rush into anything. You don't know the new guy well enough. Why is he so persistent? Just be cautious. Money isn't everything, as someone said above. If he really cares, he will wait a little longer. For the other one, remain friends for now. You don't have to devote your life to him, there is just too much uncertainty about his future.
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 2:27 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • DAT OLD FART. GO WITH THE OLD DUDE IF U WANT A SUGAR DADDY, BUT WHY SETTLE 4 LESS? IF YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE YOU CAN'T TRULY MOVE ON WITH A NEW MAN BECAUSE YOUR HEART BELONGS TO SOMEONE ELSE. DON'T PUT THE 48 YO IN A SITUATION WHERE U KNOW U MAY NEVER WORK OUT. BE TRUE TO YOURSELF AND YOUR HEART AND BE FAIR TO THE MEN THAT YOU ARE CHOOSING BETWEEN. HE IS OLD SO OF COURSE HE'S READY TO SETTLE, BUT YOU STILL HAVE SOME TIME SO REALLY THINK WISELY ABOUT YOUR DECISION. HOW LONG UNTIL THE ARMY DUDE COMES HOME OR SETTLES/BECOME STABLE?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • i am not sure when he will be stable he is stationed in georgia right now and he says some time next year he will be in different states because of training and in 2010 he is sure he will be deployed but he doesnt know where or exactly when
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:58 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I've been married to my husband (44 years old) for 5 years and I've been falling in love with a marines guy (29 years old) for a year now. And the story almost the same but in some opposite way. My marines guy want me to wait for stability but we are in love for each other while my husband give me more stability and security in fact that I don't have to work outside the house.But if I can suggest you something, if I can change anything. I will wait for my marines and being in love. Money and stability can give you feeling of security and we don't have to work our ass off but it's not guarantee that you'll be happy.but if I were you I better wait knowing that me and my marines have love for each other than being with someone just because of security. Because at the end, only love that matter. Good Luck!!
    cbbp7spirits

    Answer by cbbp7spirits at 4:08 PM on Oct. 28, 2008