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Any advice on grandparent interference?

My husband, son , and I currently live with my mother. We are having a problem with her pretty much letting him do what he wants, and when we don't let him get his way, he runs to her like she is going to save him or something. It is getting harder and harder for us to discipline him. Anyone have any similar issues? Any advice?

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Asked by rheannonbby at 11:03 PM on Oct. 18, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 3 (24 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • that is what grandparents are there for. just have to keep on doing it. trust me my parents are the same way but she knows i mean business. just have to just keep at it. i don't live with my parents but live very close by and they are with her alot so its tough but persistance on your part will prevail. good luck.

    Answer by lambdarose at 11:08 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • My first bit of advice would be to talk to you mother. You and your husband sit down with her and explain the situation from your veiwpoint and ask her to get on board with you. Next would be for you and your husband to move out of your mother's house. As long as you live there you're at her mercy for if she's willing to work with the two of you on disciplining him or not.

    Answer by Skipo510 at 11:10 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • im having the same problem with my so i also live with my parents i will tell my son no and they say yes and hes not listen to me anymore like he use to it does get better though

    Answer by mamamtobe at 11:19 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Thank you for all of the advice. We have tried talking to her a number of times, and she tells us okay, but nothing ever changes. So we have been talking about our options, and moving out is the next step. I'm just afraid that it will be just a little while before we can get to that. He is to the point now, that even when she isn't at the house and he gets in trouble, he will scream for her. It is getting really hard to deal with.

    Comment by rheannonbby (original poster) at 11:24 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • YES, YES, YES...we are having the same problem. Due to our house being robbed, we moved out right away and now reside with my mother. Since, she is grandma she doesn't discipline my son like she did with me and he gets away with a lot. My dh has talked to him and explained what we say goes over what she says, but he tries to escape us and run to her for help when he is getting disciplined by us. This is very frustrating...I can;t believe he gets away with back talk, etc when dealing with my mom. I guess the days of her putting her foot down has ended, lol. I don't have any suggestions at this time, but if you come up with something please share.

    Answer by siimply_me at 12:28 AM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • well, i know it may not be the smartest thing, because im still very young and a new parent. but i had a situation similar. you are staying in her house, so pick a day and dont clean up after your son. i mean, let him run a train on her house. when she starts to get on you for it say well, we've been trying to teach him to pick up after himself but you letting him do whatever he wants gives him the impression that he doesnt need to respect you or your house. and see if that makes her wake up a little. bcus as she spoils him you have to sit there and go behind him and keep him in line so she doesnt really see the damage she is doing. i agree that it is the grandparents job to spoil, however there is a BIG difference between spoiling and ruining. good luck hun

    Answer by .Yours.Truly. at 12:53 AM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • if i find something that works i will be sure to let you know. she cleans up after us anyway lol if i clean up she goes behind me and does it again so even if i leave a mess it may not phase her but im willing to try! thanks :)

    Comment by rheannonbby (original poster) at 2:25 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

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