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I have a boyfriend but I met this other guy and I really want to start talking to him. What should I do?

My boyfriend and I have a daughter who will be 2 and we have been together for almost 3 years now. I'm happy but I'm bored. I'm a stay at home mom and I'm with our daughter 24/7 and he's working all the time and every day off he gets he's with his buddies. I would try to throw myself on him but sometimes he rejects me. Now this other guy I've known for a while by a friend but we never really talked, talked. I went to a bar the other day and this guy was their bartender. I was really surprised and I sat at the bar and we started talking the whole night. we were flirting and everything, he invited me to his place and I wanted him so bad too but I knew I couldn't do that to my boyfriend. I just don't know what to do. I really just don't want to get caught and have regret and mess up a decent relationship. PLEASE HELP, NEED ADVICE!!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:15 PM on Oct. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Do you really need the answer on what you should do? Keep your legs closed or leave your boyfriend.
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 11:18 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Try to figure out how to fix what you have if it is not fixable, then move on....

    Regrets is what you will have, and Guilt if your really love your man. Is one night worth the lost of your mans love? How would you feel if he was cheating on you?

    You have to put the shoe on the other foot. You were at the bar so I guess you get out once in a while, I would not put my self in that position. If you want to be single move on but cheating is never the way. Trust me it will bite you in the butt.

    Karma is very powerful.
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 11:19 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Yep, if you want to leave, then leave. But don't start having sex with someone beforehand. But maybe this is a great sign it's time to reassess what you are doing with your life and your relationship. Good luck!
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 11:20 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • You're a mom to a daughter that needs stability. Play time is over for you....time to be a grown up. Sorry if that's not what you want to hear.
    DMac08

    Answer by DMac08 at 11:21 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • I agree with previous posters... Do you really want to take your daughter out of a stable home with her father for something that you THINK might be better?

    It's life and parenthood...its all tough decisions.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 11:24 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • You obviously had those same feelings for your babys' daddy in the beginning. Stay logical and don't make your life complicated. You know what you have with your boyfriend now. It is normal to want what you don't have. I suggest you take a second look at what you would risk to search for "the excitement" that is already in your own relationship, you just have to start looking at things different. If you need a change , then do it with your living, life and make changes personally , not in your relationships.
    LeJane

    Answer by LeJane at 11:38 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • decide if you want to stay or leave the boyfriend, but in the meantime, I think you've got nothing to loose by telling your boyfriend the truth. that you are unhappy and am tempted by someone else. Because if you go to this other man you'll loose him anyway, and you sound unhappy. Doubt if you will suddenly get happy unless something changes.

    So I say one way or another, make something change with your boyfriend or leave him.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:42 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • First question: Does this guy know you are with someone? If so, & he's still trying get you into the bedroom? I wouldn't give him a second thought. Any man that has no respect for a woman & the relationship she is in, doesn't deserve the time or a relationship. He will never be faithful to you! As far as your boyfriend, my question is: Has he always choosen his friends over you? Was this child created or an accident? Maybe he's bored & doesn't want to be tied down. If he enjoyed your company in the beginning, try to remember some of those things that drew him to you. Bring in some new excitement. Pick him up from work one night (have a sitter) take him to dinner & dancing (or whatever you use to love doing together) Don't talk about the baby, work, or whats wrong. Keep the evening light and fun. Make him feel special; maybe he thinks you love baby more than him coz she gets all the attention. Hope this helps you both.
    Prayerpartner

    Answer by Prayerpartner at 1:37 AM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • I agree with PP
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 2:44 AM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • If you go ahead and have sex with this man, will you regret it? Will having sex with this man change anything about your "bored" life? If you're looking for someone else to define your life, then I say go for it...but if you're willing to give the relationship you're in your all, then change the status of being "bored". There's nothing written in stone that life has to be boring because you are a sahm. As quiet as its kept, having sex with someone else, while in a relationship with someone, is wrong...why create problems in your current relationship? If you're not happy with this man and he's not fulfilling you in this relationship, then leave him alone and give him that much respect for being the father of your child...don't hurt him just because you're bored!
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 12:39 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

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