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4 Bumps

I moved from a place that I love, I feel very attatched to, and had great friends in. We moved to a place that I hate, I feel no connection to at all, and the people that think they are my friends are really just people I talk to so that im not always alone. I don't even like them. I miss my old town like nothing else, and some nights I can hardly stand it. I look at pictures and just cry. I miss everyone and don't like it here. What should I do?

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mariemont21

Asked by mariemont21 at 11:22 PM on Oct. 18, 2010 in Travel

Level 2 (5 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • hang in there! I am sure you moved for a good reason, and i am sure that it will be better soon!
    happy2bmom25

    Answer by happy2bmom25 at 11:24 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • You have to make the new place better. I have been in the same position and you can wallow in the fact that you do not like a place or learn to make the most of it. Meet new friends, find new fun places and be determined to like it rather than not like it.
    Melbornj

    Answer by Melbornj at 11:24 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Give it time!! I left CA and moved to MN.. I was soooooo depressed for months. I cried, felt stuck, lonely and out of place. I would talk just so I didn't feel alone too! Find something to get involved in. A part time job, school, groups, network, network network. It's been five years now and it's getting better. I have a whole new group of friends. It just takes time to build that back up again.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 11:25 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Keep trying. Give the new friends a chance. Moving is hard but someone will come along that will make it all bearable. Change takes courage and it can be a good thing. You can't always run home to the nest. It's a good test of will to do this. Embrace it and learn about yourself while you're alone. Dig in deep and see what you're made of. Also, do something nice for yourself.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 11:25 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • I tried that when I gave my now ex husband a second chance and I was miserable the whole time and we only moved 5 hours away...That lasted 3 months and me and my daughter left and came HOME.
    I didn't know the layout of the town, didn't know anybody except a handful of people that my ex husband and his family were friends with and you dont know if you can trust them or what kind of person they are so that was depressing bc you couldn't talk to them openly...I tried giving the place a chance but I eventually just stayed at the apartment ALL the time and wouldn't even leave to go grocery shopping bc I resented the entire town.
    In all honesty I would I would do what makes you happy. If I would have stayed I wouldnt have the life, the husband, the family, or my 2nd baby girl I have now.
    misspriss_1987

    Answer by misspriss_1987 at 11:32 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • I went through that. I was depressed for 8 months and I ended up moving back.
    PoisonousBlonde

    Answer by PoisonousBlonde at 11:42 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Well, it is obvious that you have not moved or had to adapt before this and that you are very young. The answer is ....stop feeling sorry for yourself and go out and make friends , get a job, contribute to your surroundings, stop living in the past and grow up. Really!
    Think about what it would be like to move to another state every year or two and having kids too...having to find new friends, doing most of it by yourself. I am describing Military life and what Moms have to do and they don't cry and look at old pictuies. They make the most of it and look ahead . Stop the pity party.
    kerp1960

    Answer by kerp1960 at 11:44 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • Why did you move? Is there the possibility of moving back to where you came from? Have you looked into any mom groups where you are now? Could it be that you've set it in your mind at this point that you don't like it or anything about it, and nothing will ever change? Are you there because of your SO? Have you talked to him about it?
    musicpisces

    Answer by musicpisces at 11:47 PM on Oct. 18, 2010

  • No offense, but quit wallowing and get out there and make it better for yourself. If all you do is think about how you miss the old place you aren't een giving the new place a real chance. I grew up moving around every few years, all the way up until i was in my early 20's. I hated to leave japan and I hated to leave Germany and I hated to leave Florida, but I got out and found things I liked and I immersed myself in my family. You grow closer to them and you'll find new things to do and new things you like.
    BigfordBrat

    Answer by BigfordBrat at 9:07 AM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • Change is hard especially when you have to start completely over...it's much easier to make friends if you work outside the home. If not, I would suggest finding a church to meet others like yourself.
    Queenofscrap

    Answer by Queenofscrap at 6:24 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

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